Tuesday night was the night America had been waiting for. That’s right, the show has gone from an overindulgent 120 minutes to a more manageable 85. Whew! My pop culture calories were getting out of control!
Ryan informed us that the theme was “most popular downloads,” which meant that they could sing “any song they want, as long as it’s a popular download on iTunes.”
After the obligatory chitchat with the judges and a contractual Ford music video, Seacrest mentions that since the theme was “popular music,” the Idols were going to sing -- what else? -- “Don’t Stop Believing” by Journey because, apparently, it is one of the most “popular” downloads on iTunes.
Could Tivo put Glambert in the Bottom Three?
More on that later, but first ... we have to look at some baby pictures.
Really.
Oddly, no mention at all Wednesday night of the overtime glitch that left DVR viewers out in the cold for Glambert’s performance. But they did seem to have time for Seacrest to yet again make fun of Simon’s age. Isn’t that joke getting old?
Apparently Frankie Avalon’s “Venus” was on the top of the charts when Simon was born and so they showed a clip of him singing it ....
You know, for a show whose producers are obviously worried about time issues, they sure did let Seacrest drone on and on, coming up with adjectives for the judges’ personalities.
Then Seacrest and Simon went back and forth, explaining that because of said time issues, only two judges would critique each contestant, which meant only half the contestants would hear from Simon, the only judge whose opinion carries any weight. (And who made it very clear he was not happy with this new time-saving plan.)
“The Judges’ Save is still in play,” says Ryan. But only for the next two weeks. Foreshadowing, anyone?
We are truly down to the real professionals at this point. I mean, they weren’t even lip syncing ‘She’s a Maniac!” I guess when you earn your way into the Top 7, the producers trust that you can learn both your own song and a group number (not to mention a Ford music video number).
Ryan didn’t bother too much with the BS this week, no doubt due to the time issues that have been plaguing the show. They didn’t even have time to feature a mentor for the Donna Summer -- oops, I mean “disco” themed show. I guess Ms. Summer doesn’t have anything to promote.
“Idol” failed to deliver on a singing mentor this week, but we did get a dance mentor.
That’s right, Paula brought it! Sometimes when she spouts metaphors about moths and melons, it leaves us shaking our heads, wondering what’s really in her Coca-Cola cup. But there’s no denying the woman is talented -- if not for her singing then for her moves. She was the Britney of the '80s -- amazing dancer, phenomenal lip-syncer.
Perhaps it was to put the “Team Kara” critics to rest on the issue of her relevance?
So it was Rat Pack Night! Yes! Finally a theme I can get behind! I was fired up for Michael Buble, the obvious choice for mentor.
Then in walks ... Jamie Foxx. What? Was this another example of the producers’ “let’s make Quentin Tarantino a singing mentor” logic? Perhaps it was a PR stunt to atone for his recent (kinda funny) comments about Miley Cyrus and her gums.
Wow. On "It Don't Mean a Thing," the Idols actually seemed to be singing live, a testament to their collective talent! Kris Allen, we've all bought into the idea that you're the "cute one." How about dressing up a little next time?
After the group number, we were all treated to an inexplicable food fight started by Danny Gokey. It (perhaps inappropriately) brought to mind the "sloshing" phenomenon, featured on the HBO series "Real Sex."
