If a network acquires a show that was taped almost a year ago and it airs the finale, did the season ever really happen?

I just couldn’t get fully invested in “Project Runway” this time around, and I blame the delay, among other things.  After all, fashion should be current by its very definition. (I should know; I shop at fashionista-friendly Target and once worked at the cutting edge house of style known as the Gap.)

One thing the finale had going for it, though, was that it was back in New York. And, let’s face it; the Big Apple is really the heart of “Runway.”  (That and Tim Gunn!)

The other component that makes the show so compelling is the personalities of the designers, which oftentimes overshadow the actual designs themselves. Past seasons have given us reality gold in characters such as Santino, Jeffrey Sebelia and Wendy Pepper.

Maybe it’s just a coincidence that there’s always a villain in the top three. (By the way, if you actually believe that, then you probably also think that it’s just a coincidence that both Voltaggio brothers have made it to the Final Four on “Top Chef.”)

This year’s villain came in the form of ice princess Irina, whose designs impressed the judges and whose personality pissed off the other contestants with her accusations of fashion plagiarism -- particularly annoying since she herself had to ditch much of her line due to copyright infringement. But bitches, male and female, often do well in this competition.  

Unfortunately for me, though, the finale did not deliver in the drama department -- on the runway or off. Lifetime promised us a Tim Gunn meltdown in the promos. And come on, if anyone knows meltdowns, it’s Lifetime. But said meltdown was basically Tim telling the designers to hurry up. I was waiting for an Irina/Althea catfight, especially when their makeup looks were eerily similar, but it never came. In fact, the most dramatic moments were provided by Carol Hannah throwing up.

The Bryant Park show lacked drama, as well. Remember the showstopping fashions of Kenley or Kara Saun? Or when Jay sent all his models down the runway wearing headphones? In those seasons, the finale was a real show, in every sense of the word. 

The looks were dramatic and the fashion “stories” were obvious. Everything tied together to make an entertaining presentation, from the clothes down to the music. Not so this time around.

Over the course of a TV week, Irina’s collection somehow morphed from a Coney Island-inspired line into some sort of dissertation on “what it takes to survive in the city as a woman.” Interestingly enough, though, I did not see anything that Mariska Hargitay would wear on “Law & Order: SVU.” Apparently, surviving in the city as a woman involves wearing lots of black and some felt helmets.

Althea, often the subject of Irina’s icy glares, presented a collection inspired by sci-fi movies of the '50s and '60s and the future. At least, that’s what she claimed. Now, I am no Anna Wintour, but I missed the connection between science fiction and chunky sweaters. Sometimes I feel that the designers throw out interesting-sounding concepts just to make it look like their collections have “stories.”

Althea did surpass Irina in the color scheme department, though, by incorporating not only black but other inspired hues, like white and gray.  Oh, and don’t forget the always dazzling nude.

Carol Hannah’s collection stood out for me, not only because it used real colors but also because I thought it was the most aesthetically pleasing. She was inspired by gothic architecture and fairy tales, as well as a moonlight walk at Duke University. (Huh?)

Still, as much as I liked it (or didn’t mind it, I should say), it wasn’t cohesive and the judges called her out on that.  (Speaking of judges, what was up with Suzy Menkes’ hair? Get her to the Garnier Hair Studio stat!)

In the end, the judges thought that Irina “made it work” the best. and she was the recipient of $100,000, a fashion spread in Marie Claire and a trip to Paris. The only explanation that I can come up with is that Nina Garcia sees herself in Irina’s cold demeanor and that maybe the tanning bed has fried Michael Kors’ brain.

What did you think of this season? Will you be tuning in for the new season in January?

Last night’s finale of “America's Next Top Model" was actually kind of a nail-biter. (Except, of course, for you hand models out there.)  

The competition came down to Nicole, the awkward redhead from Colorado, and Laura, the sweet Southern Belle. (By the way, not to brag, but they comprised two thirds of my team in my “ANTM” fantasy league!)

As you know, the prizes include a $100,000 contract with Cover Girl, as well as representation and a cover shoot for Seventeen magazine. There is also the possibility of becoming the answer to a Trivial Pursuit question once you fade into obscurity. (And don’t forget multiple appearances on the “Tyra” show!)

Speaking of Tyra, does anyone else feel like this show has become less of a modeling competition and more of a manifesto on the future of girls’ self esteem? The very fact that the models were 5’7” and under, this cycle just goes to show that Tyra is trying to “make all girls feel beautiful.” I mean, if I wanted to cry, I’d watch “Hoarders.” (Seriously, ya’ll, that show is deep!)

This cycle seemed to go beyond looks, though. When all the models are physically deformed, i.e., “short” -- you have to judge them on their other disabilities. (God forbid you judge the models on their looks!)

Nicole’s challenge is -- well how do I put this? It’s that she has no personality. She is socially awkward and the other models were suspicious of her from day one, often crossing into Mean Girl territory.

I couldn’t really blame them. Half of the time she seems high and the other half she seems to be on another planet.  

Her saving grace though? She takes damn good pictures. Oh, and she’s a redhead. (OK, so maybe I’m biased.) I have to admit that her personality grew on me. She is a self-professed dork who says she’d like to make new friends but can never think of what to say to people. Hmmm, sounds like the kind of issue that a lot of adolescent girls deal with.I smell relatability (and money)!

As for Laura, she has the face of an angel and the accent of a truck-stop waitress (or a cow castrator, which, incidentally, she actually is). Like Nicole, her photos almost seemed to portray a different person altogether, one who was confident and sexy. And, unlike Nicole, she actually has a good runway walk.

Laura’s fatal flaw (or redeeming quality, depending on how you look at it) is that she’s dyslexic. And poor. And heavily accented. Did I mention that she castrates cows? Again, dyslexia is an issue that affects the self esteem of many a girl. Marketing gold! (But, honestly, does a model really need too no how to reed real good?)

These girls were pretty equally matched, with different strengths. Laura gave lots of personality when shooting the Cover Girl commercial, but Nicole could actually read the copy for the commerical. I think that the winner of Cycle 13 really came down to what Tyra felt was the biggest social issue facing tweens.

I mean, now that her TZone Foundation no longer has a camp, she has to figure out some way to spread her message.

I thought for sure it would be Laura and her dyslexia, since they made such a big deal out of it when shooting the commercial. But it looks like Nicole’s social awkwardness prevailed. After all, there isn’t a girl out there who’s never felt left out.

Clearly, being America’s Next Top Model is kind of a big deal. Being America’s Next Top Petite Model? Well, that should probably be a much smaller deal (pun intended), but I guess we’ll just have to wait and see how much LashBlast mascara Nicole’s ad ends up selling.

Last night’s “Biggest Loser” had the contestants literally jumping through hoops to stay in the game. And, make no mistake, the participants are now treating this life-altering opportunity as a game. It’s like Tracey the Sea Witch cast a spell before she left last week!

On last night’s episode, Sami Brady announced that not one but TWO of the eight Losers would be eliminated. The player with the lowest percentage of weight loss would be “below the red line” and out automatically, with no discussion. Additionally, the players with the second and third lowest percentage of weight loss would be up for elimination, with the usual weekly vote taking place.

You know it’s never that simple, though. With clear alliances drawn, this season is delving into “Survivor” territory. This week there was a clear division with two groups of four: the young against the old.

While I don’t want to sound like a death panel proponent, I will say this: The older people have had a chance to live their lives. They all have spouses and children of their own. Heck, Liz isn’t even that fat (for a Southern grandma, at least)! Give the youngsters a chance at life. Besides, they all have “such pretty faces.”

Throwing more wrenches into the weight loss process were this week’s challenges, both of which proved to be pivotal in gameplay.

The first challenge awarded Allen a one-pound advantage. Then, in the “jumping through hoops” immunity challenge, Rudy and Shay made a deal to be the last two standing. Rudy broke his word and this elicited a string of insults from Shay as he jumped his way to immunity.

When it came time for the weigh-in, there were a few shockers. Shay was praying to lose 12 pounds and actually ended up losing 17. (I think a good 4 pounds of that was lost in tears.) An impressive number nonetheless, especially since it made her the first woman in “Loser” history to lose 100 pounds in 9 weeks!

Daniel and Amanda each lost 5 pounds, with Daniel falling under the red line. He was sent home immediately.Allen lost 10 pounds, which should’ve put him under the yellow line with Amanda. But he won the pop challenge, remember? His one-pound advantage saved him from elimination and the person with the next lowest percentage of weight loss was up for elimination.

Unfortunately, in this case, losing almost 20 pounds in one week was not enough to keep Shay above the yellow line. And how COULD it be? While she has lost 100 pounds, she still has over 200 to go. Somehow it doesn’t seem fair for her to compete physically or on the scale with people much smaller than her.

The most infuriating part of the episode was the voting process. Shay versus Amanda seems pretty clear-cut to me. And, I might add, it seemed pretty clear-cut to the Bob and Jillian as well. While Bob is close with Amanda, even he couldn’t argue when Jillian said Shay needed to stay more. It’s obvious. The woman weighs almost 400 pounds! Call it a game if you want but it is “bigger” than that, no pun intended.

As Bob said, “This is not just a reality television show. This is about eight people’s lives.”

Apparently the other contestants, now immersed in gameplay, did not get that memo. True, Amanda is not that much of a threat; even on her best week she only lost 7 pounds. But how much of a threat is Shay? Because of her size, her numbers have to be outstanding to even have a fighting chance against the other players. And yet, some of her competitors didn’t even want to give her a fighting chance at LIFE.

“I’m not asking you to keep me here so I can play,” she said. “I’m asking you to keep me here so I can live.”

The fact that Allen, who would’ve been up for elimination himself if he hadn’t won the challenge, voted for Shay really ticked me off. Even worse was his explanation that he thought she had grasped the concepts of weight loss and had it under control. Give me a break!

Rebecca also voted against Shay, not surprising since she is close with Amanda. Danny voted for Amanda and Liz, in an act of gameplay, also voted for Amanda.

And then there was Rudy. Here is someone who also set a “Loser” record, shedding 100 pounds in seven weeks. Before he revealed his vote he mentioned that it was based on goal setting.

“Setting goals for yourself is so important and conquering those goals is so much more important. It gets you through the ranch. It gets you through life,” he said, in an obvious nod to fellow record-holder Shay.

Whoa. Maybe not so obvious.

His vote was to send Shay home. Perhaps a petty payback for their tiff at the circus? I couldn’t believe it. I literally had to put down my Cheetos and Dr. Pepper and rewind the DVR to process what had just happened.

Shay, the heaviest contestant in “Loser” history, was sent home.

I hope and pray that she finds the strength to lose the weight at home on her own. The absence of a “Where Is She Now?” transformation segment left me discouraged, though.

On the other hand, Daniel seems to be doing well at home. He has continued to lose weight and even has a girlfriend! In his update segment, it was quite the sobering image to see him juxtaposed against his friend and partner from last season, the morbidly obese David. You could see the sadness in Daniel’s eyes as David said that he had “more important” things going on now than losing weight.

It is a shame that both of these players had to leave this early. Shay really needed this opportunity for her health. As for Daniel, he’s about as inspiring as they come. (Like a white male Oprah, but more svelte!) For someone so young, he seems to be one of the few participants who actually gets it.

“Winning the show is not really winning,” he said. “Winning was making the decision to do it.”
 

The bombshells are back!

Yes, we’re still mourning the loss of the Housewives of Atlanta (Oh, NeNe, how I’ll miss your bralessness!) but Bravo didn’t waste any time getting us back on track.  We went straight from the Atlanta reunion show into the Season 5 premiere of “The Real Housewives of Orange County.”

While collagen and catfights have been staples in every version of the “Housewives” franchise, some would say that the OC “ladies” (I use the word loosely) do it best because they did it first.  Sure, Atlanta provided us with lots of wig-centered drama this season (and I got a great new ringtone in “Tardy For the Party”).  But on what other show can you find a guy (Slade) who’s “bagged” three of the Housewives?  Dwight certainly hasn’t, penile implant or not.

In the premiere, the drama focused mainly on the beefbetween lookalikes Gretchen and Tamra. At the heart of the issue is Tamra’s disgust over Gretchen cheating on her now-deceased sugar daddy, Jeff, last season.  (But I think that, really, she’s still jealous over Gretchen’s pink motorcycle.)  Ever the class act, Tamra is also appalled at Gretchen’s nude internet photos, but mainly because one featured a vibrator with a cord. (Retro is totally in, but seriously, how old is that thing?)

The main event took place at Lynne’s luncheon to show off her tacky overpriced cuff bracelets.  It was a big deal, of course, because everyone knows that Gretchen and Tamra hate each other.  But it was also the first time in months that Vicki and Jeana (my favorite Housewife) were in the same room.  You see, it seems that Jeana asked Vicki for a loan and was denied.  (It’s a recession, ya’ll!) We also learned that Jeana has been taking financial advice from her son. (Tactic number one: beg for money!)

It is no wonder Vicki turned her down, despite her seemingly booming business.  She has always been the bitchiest of the Housewives.  I think this is her way of compensating for the fact that she’s also the most unattractive of the Housewives.

Yes, Lynne’s cuff bracelets WERE gaudily awful

 (www.lynnecurtin.com).  But Vicki pretty much said so in her confessional and then commended herself for not “being mean” to poor Lynne’s face.  Anyone could see the jewelry was tacky. But at least the other Housewives had the tact to keep their mouths shut. Then again, their taste DOES come into question when you think about that whole quarrel over the pink motorcycle.

Once the cuff bracelets were on and the wine started flowing, Gretchen and Tamra had some heated words.  When Tamra brought up Gretchen’s racy photos, Jeana came to her defense stating that, “She’s single; she’s allowed.”  I would expect no less from a former Miss November.  Like the merged tribe ganging up on the arrogant Erik on last night’s “Survivor,” Gretchen finally stood up for herself and told Tamra to shut the f--- up!

The episode then ended with a “...To Be Continued.”

I’ll be back next week to “watch what happens.” Will you? 

Now that we’re running low on daylight hours, you’ll be happy to know that there are plenty of new reality shows to watch (you know, in lieu of breathing in that pesky fresh air).

In fact, three debuted just this week on what I like to call the “third-tier” networks of the reality world. (That means that they’re not one of the Big Four, but they’re not Bravo either.)

The shows could not be more different from one another, yet they are each fabulous in their own way.

“Flowers Uncut” premiered last night on TLC. It follows Jeff Leatham, former artistic director for the Four Seasons Paris, as he moves to New York to bring his floral artistry to the Big Apple.

At first I wasn’t sure what this show was doing on TLC. After all, there was nary a midget, multiple nor monkey baby to be found in the first episode! But then I remembered TLC’s other “Pillar of Randomness.” No, not child beauty pageants -- weddings. Of course! Flowers = weddings.

Leatham and his (Dutch maybe?) assistant Mat are nice enough, but the real stars of this show are Jeff’s modern yet beautiful designs. No wonder Eva Longoria Parker hired him to do her wedding! (If you missed that bit of info, don’t worry; it seems to come up repeatedly.)

I’m hoping that as the season goes on, Leatham will come out of his shell a bit more and provide some non-floral drama. After all, let’s face it: Flowers are pretty and all, but what we really want in a reality show is “character.”

Over on VH1 this week, two celebrity shows premiered. “Sex Rehab With Dr. Drew” aired on Sunday, while “I Want to Work for Diddy 2” debuted Monday.

While it’s difficult and insensitive to make fun of a show about addiction, I will certainly try.

First of all, who are these “celebrities” I’ve never heard of? Apparently one is a former Miss Teen US, which is not to be confused with Miss Teen USA. I watch all the pageant shows on TLC and even I have never heard of this one. And is anyone surprised to learn that porn stars, former Playmates and the woman who allegedly broke up Britney and Kevin all have issues with sex?

It is sometimes very hard to watch. I must say that these “celebs” are all very brave to go through treatment on camera.

The real star, as always, is Dr. Drew, who could give Barbara Walters a run for her money in a “making celebrities cry” competition. I have to admit that I have a little crush on him and wouldn’t be surprised if some of his patients become fixated on his, um, bedside manner.

Sean “P Daddy Puff Diddy” Combs’ show is a little more lighthearted, though I’m not sure he’d say the same. Once again, Diddy is looking for an assistant and has to choose from a pool of applicants, including a pageant queen (of course) and both an Ebony AND an Ivory (their real names).

This is Diddy’s version of “The Apprentice,” the difference being that the tasks are utterly ridiculous and the participants are utterly stupid. For instance, upon arrival, all 11 contestants are forced to sleep outside in a parking lot before going on a surprise interview the next morning with Puffy himself. Wow, they must really want to work for Diddy (or be on TV).

Additionally, Puff calls up each team on their special direct-line red phones in the middle of tasks to ask for things like 60 white balloons or Puff Daddy cologne from the Sean John store.

It is silly and mindless entertainment, but I can’t wait to see whom he chooses. Mark my words: Whoever it is will not be working for him by this time next year.

No, they’re not “American Idol,” but these shows and their multiple airings should keep you busy until the holidays . ..or at least until tonight when “The Real Housewives of Orange County” premieres!

Want a good scare this Halloween? Well, start by thinking about how many hours are gonna be lost each week now that “So You Think You Can Dance” is back in its full bedazzled glory.

It’s no secret that the dance shows are not my favorite reality subgenre. There’s just not enough backstabbing, drunkenness or fat people.

You may be surprised to discover that my favorite reality shows are actually the ones dealing with the paranormal.

That’s right; I said it.

I am obsessed, though it’s usually not the kind of information I like to lead with when meeting new people. (Neither is my strange obsession with wax museums, nor the elation I felt when I learned that Diablo Cody was penning a movie based on the “Sweet Valley High” series.)

Remember the old “Unexplained” segment on “Unsolved Mysteries"? Robert Stack’s eerie appearance in the mist came at a time in my life when my thirst for the unknown was no longer being quenched by checking out “13 Alabama Ghosts and Jeffrey” every week on “library day.” ( BTW -- that book was in high demand and sometimes I had to settle for books about Tennessee, Georgia and even -- gasp! -- Mississippi ghosts ... and Jeffrey, of course; he gets around apparently.)

The point is, I fancy myself a bit of an amateur paranormal expert. As you know, I fancy myself a bit of a reality expert, too. So here is my guide to paranormal reality shows, the best ... and the rest.

"Ghost Adventures" (Travel Channel, Fridays; new episodes start Nov. 6.)

Sure, I’m glad that interest in the spiritual world has become more mainstream. In the past, people who were curious about the unknown were stereotyped. And let’s face it; wearing black all the time just seems so ... well, somber. On the other hand, though, I’m not sure that the ghosts are really feeling the whole Hollywood douchebag look.

But if you are, then the Travel Channel’s “Ghost Adventures” may be the reality show for you. “Bros” Zak, Nick and Aaron are not the lost Jonas Brothers, but the manscaped investigators for the show. Their goal seems to be to draw out spirits by antagonizing them whilst wearing Ed Hardy gear. Bad idea in my opinion. Perhaps I could lend them my copy of “The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Communicating With Spirits.” (Yes, an actual book that I own.)

I have to admit, though, that their experiences seem authentic, and the show may be worth your time if you can tolerate all the exclamations of “bro!” and “dude!” (I cannot.)

"Paranormal State" (A&E, Mondays)

Every episode begins with this voiceover: “Each year, PRS receives hundreds of reports of paranormal activity ... only responding to the most severe.”

I have to say that I just might fake some activity to receive a visit from Ryan Buell, founder of Penn State’s Paranormal Research Society and the dreamiest of all the reality investigators. If he’d get rid of that tacky man earring, I could see a future for us (sorry Anoop!), though he must be an ninth-year senior by now.

And -- bonus! -- oftentimes, super-flamboyant Atlanta psychic Chip Coffey (of A&E’s equally creepy “Psychic Kids”) is called in to help.

While there is much internet chatter claiming that the show is not “real,” I’d argue that neither was “The Sixth Sense” and it still scared the crap out of me. True, PRS could launch an investigation based on someone passing gas, but it’s a guilty pleasure nonetheless.

I think the fact that it is a college group adds to its appeal, too, as I can well recall skipping class on the days that world-famous psychic Sylvia Browne was featured on the “Montel” show. There is a payoff in every episode, whether it’s a door slamming or the performance of an exorcism.

"Ghost Hunters" (SyFy, Wednesdays)

While “Paranormal State” always delivers in the drama department, “Ghost Hunters” can be a little anticlimactic. Nevertheless, this show is probably the most authentic representation of what ghost hunting is all about.

You’re not going to catch an EVP or a full-bodied apparition on every investigation. Mostly, paranormal investigations are about reviewing hours of evidence in real time and coming up with no conclusive proof of a haunting.

That being said, the episode where TAPS investigated the site of the Manson murders had me sleeping with my David Archuleta night light for at least a week. The evidence caught was truly chilling and seemed to have more weight to it than the “Paranormal State” cases, as Ryan & Co. seem to find something on every outing. Grant and Jason’s blue-collar sensibilities just reek of sincerity. (Or is that smell left over from one of their Roto Rooter jobs?)

Keep an eye out for “Ghost Hunters Academy,” premiering Nov. 11 on SyFy.

"Ghost Lab" (Discovery, Tuesdays)

This program just debuted this month. The Everyday Paranormal team, headed by the Klinge brothers, Brad and Barry, has the same “everyman” relatability as TAPS. The difference? They utilize the outside opinions of experts such as neuroscientists and anthropologists. (I mean, face it, Grant and Jason, plumbing can only get you so far.)

While it’s too early to tell if this show will survive among the influx of ghostcentric shows, I advise giving it a chance.

"Extreme Paranormal" (A&E)

This show aired as a “two-night special event” the past two Mondays and my understanding is that it may be picked up as a series depending on audience reaction.

My reaction? It is much like “Ghost Adventures” as far as antagonizing ghosts. In fact, the three investigators -- Shaun, Nathan and Jason -- even go as far as burying each other alive and offering up their own blood in an effort to taunt the spirits.

The scariest part of this show? The “acting.” It is worse than Dina Lohan’s portrayal of a responsible mother on “Living Lohan.” If you’re gonna fake your show, you might as well hire real actors. How about Katie and Micah from “Paranormal State?”

Additionally, may I suggest a drinking game? For every time someone refers to “pushing it to the limit” or “pushing the boundaries,” take a swig. Much like the “Biggest Loser” “my weight loss journey” drinking game, you’re guaranteed to have a good buzz by the third commercial break.

This show is entertaining, but not for the reason intended. Stay tuned to see if it’s picked up.

For believers and non-believers alike, each of these shows is intriguing for different reasons. In fact, “Ghost Adventures” has even been featured on (best show ever!) “The Soup.”

Keep an eye out for these special Halloween episodes:

Friday: “Ghost Adventures” live investigation of Trans-Allegheny Lunatic Asylum in West Virginia

Saturday: “Ghost Hunters” live Halloween investigation of the Essex County Hospital in New Jersey

It’s good to see that there are some reality stars who still rely on hard work and likability to propel them further along in the game. (And I’m definitely not referring to little Charlie from this week’s “Toddlers and Tiaras.”) I’m speaking of Russell on “Survivor” (black attorney Russell, not to be confused with white lying SOB Russell.)

As chief of Tribe Falu, Russell has proven his leadership skills time and again, and his guidance has helped his team win all but one of the reward challenges. In fact, just last night he tended to the fire while others took shelter during the five-day long rainstorm. (To be fair, though, this may have been partially to make up for the fact that he chose pillows and blankets for the tribe in lieu of a tarp during an earlier challenge.)

Of course, nothing is done on “Survivor” without some bit of strategy involved. As he was stoking the fire in the freezing cold rain, he himself said, “Sometimes you have to make some deposits in case you need any withdrawals later on. This is buying stock low. Hopefully I’ll be able to sell high later.”

Unfortunately, later did not come for Russell. During the reward challenge, he again stepped up to the plate to do the heavy lifting (literally) and had other team members sit out. Then he passed out ... on top of a giant puzzle.  

Of course this was hard to tell at first because ... did I mention he was blindfolded?

Russell’s heart rate had dropped very low, and it was obvious that he wouldn’t be able to compete.For the first time ever, Jeff Probst ruled that a reward challenge would not be completed. (What?! No pizza?!)

The go-getter that he is, Russell kept insisting that he wanted to go back to the game and that he was just dehydrated. But when he passed out yet again, the medics deemed him unfit to continue with the show.  (It was scary, ya’ll!)  His eyes were open but there was no one home -- kinda like Kim on “The Real Housewives of Atlanta.”

This raises a few questions for me, as earlier this season, Mike was sent home for a similar problem. While I’m glad that they have medics on set to deal with these issues, how do they ever let it get to that point in the first place?  

Yes, it’s called “Survivor,” but I don’t think the intention is to literally fight for your life!

It makes me wonder what kind of background checks are done on the contestants. What questions do they ask, other than, “What would you do with a million dollars?” While reality shows seem to be very thorough on the mental health front -- making sure they get the nuttiest people they possibly can -- I wonder how rigid they are with the physical health requirements.

As a sidenote,“The Biggest Loser” also shocked me in its premiere by making morbidly obese people run a full mile. This, as we know, ended up with two of them in the hospital! I know that they are adults and they are responsible for hydrating themselves, but sometimes you just get so busy looking for Immunity Idols and forming your “Dumbass Girl Alliance” that you forget. When someone’s health is involved, I don’t think it would hurt for the producers or medics to step in and give a gentle reminder to drink water.

As Russell lay on the ground with tears streaming down his face, Jeff Probst tried to (I think?) comfort him. “It’s frustrating to be pulled out of a game you wanted to be a part of for so long,” he said. (Sigh.) “You were in great shape.” (Burn!) You were the leader of a tribe that was dominating.” (Dig!) You were .. .no sign you were going home any time soon.” (Oh, snap!)

Got any more salt for that wound, Probst?

I was sad to see (black attorney) Russell go, as he probably had the most heart out of anyone there. Now I’m rooting for (white SOB) Russell, as I find his antics entertaining.

I wouldn’t count Shambo out, though. John claims that she poses no threat to anyone and I should believe him; he IS a rocket scientist, after all.  

Then again, that’s what they said about Jordan on “Big Brother.”

While many of you have argued in your comments that, at the end of the day, “Loser” is “just a game show,” I beg to differ. That’s like saying “Moment of Truth” was “just a game show.”  Believe me, as someone who won a Prius and some fancy spa stuff (mainly due to smoking some other contestants in the “Britney or Whitney?” round on “Temptation”), I know game shows.

And “The Biggest Loser” is no game show.

Thankfully, that point was driven home this week, as all of the contestants seemed to be focused on the bigger picture rather than what they could get away with. The teams competed in a physical challenge with the Blue Team winning. The prize? Something even better than a cruise down the Danube River! (See my appearance on “Hollywood Squares” for more info.)

They got the opportunity to go home and visit family for a week ... or to send the Black Team home to visit their families.

Hmmm, it sure would be nice to see loved ones. And, hey, there wouldn’t be anyone screaming at them to “get back on the f---ing treadmill.” But they evaluated why they were actually on the program in the first place and decided to stay at the ranch and send their competitors home.

While I was very proud of the Blue Team for making the “right choice,” I was even prouder of the Black Team once they got back home. (And even prouder that I didn’t shed my first tear until the 26-minute mark!) It’s easy (so to speak) to work out six hours a day when someone is screaming at you. What’s more difficult is taking the initiative to do it yourself. The Black Team made that effort, even though there were challenges.  

The ranch ain’t real life, people. While the program is difficult and emotional, the whole production still serves as a kind of protective cocoon from the outside world. They are shut off from everything they know to focus solely on dropping pounds, surrounded by teammates who can empathize.  

I really felt for Shay when she spoke about how hard it was to go to the gym, not because she didn’t want to exercise, but because all the other gymrats stared at her and wondered why she was there at all. To her credit, she kept on going. That takes courage.

Another challenge the Black Team faced was eating with their families. I have to say that I found it a little insensitive when both Shay and Dina’s families ordered the same unhealthy fare they’d always had. Shay was saddened at the way her stepsons ate, saying, “They’re making these choices based on what they’ve seen.” Dina even told her husband to stop and get a doggy bag and later told the camera that she was “disgusted by it.”

I’m curious to find out what will happen when they go home for good. It’s one thing to change your own eating habits, but it’s another thing to force your new lifestyle upon someone else. On the other hand, they are going to need their families’ support to maintain their weight loss and, frankly, I liken their families’ behavior last night to drinking in front of an alcoholic.

Regardless of whether their loved ones get on board or not, the contestants will have to put themselves first to succeed. Danny is already doing a great job of this. He told his daughter that they may not get to spend that much time together because Daddy had to exercise but qualified it with, “Every minute I’m away from you at the gym means years I’m gonna be with you cause I’m gonna live longer.” (Tear!)

The reality of this weight-loss journey is that no one can do it for you. That being said, it sure helps if you have a good support system. While The Black Team didn’t choose to send themselves home, I think the experience will help them prepare for the long run.

And by “the long run,” I’m not talking about winning money on a “game show.”