(Spoiler alert: Please do not read on if you haven’t watched Chapter I of “Dear White People”)
It’s always a little uncomfortable being the black guy or girl who’s being introduced to their partner’s white family. A million and two questions are invading your head — is his/her family low-key racist? Are they going to tell me they voted for Obama to make me feel comfortable? Do they even know I’m black? And etc. etc. (Just reference Jordan Peele’s “Get Out”).
But what Netflix’s “Dear White People” just revealed — also what many black people already knew — is that it’s just as awkward to bring the white guy/girl home to your family … or in the series’ case, your friends.
Samantha White (Logan Browning) is an outspoken, pro-black, call-white-people-out-on-their-bulls— type of person – but even so, she was having a kind of secret relationship with “Summer bae” a.k.a. a white guy by the name of Gabe Mitchell (John Patrick Amedori). And while Gabe wanted to take the relationship to the next level and be a bit more serious, Sam was a little wary of going public and she obviously had good reason to feel that way.
Sam and Gabe both attend a fictional, predominately white Ivy League university where racial tensions are running a bit high after an all-white (by chance, not by exclusion) school organization threw a blackface themed Halloween party. Sam, who’s the president of the Black Student Union, — and also hosts a radio show titled “Dear White People” — and the rest of the members of her organization crashed the party in protest.
So once news accidentally broke that Sam was having relations with a white guy, the entire Black Student Union looked at her a little sideways. Even though some claimed not to judge her choices and some said that they were happy for her as long as she was happy, everyone pretty much side-eyed her.
The awkwardness of the situation got even a little more real when Sam decided to embrace her white boo and bring him to a predominately black event. While Gabe was trying to be understanding of the BSU’s protest against a blackface party, he still got questioned and harassed up and down because he was white and couldn’t possibly begin to sympathize with what his black classmates were going through.
The point being, just because being white is viewed as the “norm,” or “standard” in our society, doesn’t necessarily mean you’ll be viewed that way when you come home to the meet the parents/friends. This doesn’t mean that you will be met with hate, ridicule and judgment, but bringing the white guy/girl home will be just as awkward for you as it is for the black guy/girl coming to meet the white family and friends.
For another example, see the “Guess Who’s Coming to Marry” episode of “The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air,” where Will Smith’s TV mom forbids him from going to his aunt’s wedding because she’s marrying a white guy. Or even one of the most recent episodes of “Black-ish” where Rainbow Johnson (Tracee Ellis-Ross) has a mini breakdown because her son is dating a white girl.