Alison Gold loves Asian cuisine so much that she forgot to rhyme
Rebecca Black became an instant internet sensation by singing about one of the best days of the week, and now “Friday” producer Patrice Wilson is offering up another nonsensical pop sensation with a song about one of the best meals on the planet.
Alison Gold’s single “Chinese Food” has attracted over a million views since hitting the web on Monday.
The ode to Eastern cuisine features Gold singing her heart out about how much she loves various Chinese dishes, including spicy chicken wings, fortune cookies, sweet & sour … and even some things they actually prepare and eat in China.
Like “Friday,” it features cringe-worthy forced rhymes (“broccoli” apparently rhymes with “Monopoly,” which gets a shout-out here for no apparent reason) — and a couple of lines where they didn’t even bother to try (noodles — pronounced noo-DUHLS — in a couplet with chow “moo-moo-moo-moo” mein).
It also features nearly every Asian stereotype in the book, as well as a giant panda who travels via rainbow after laying down “rhymes” about Panda Express and making it rain Monopoly money all over a group of pre-teen girls.
Yeah. We don’t really get it either. But we know what we’re having for lunch today.