Presidential elections are hardly swayed by celebrity endorsements, no matter how ditzy, doped up or debonair a star may be. But the reasoning behind some endorsements — or the sheer fact that, say, a porn star is waxing political at all — can be as humorous as it is infuriating.
On the eve of the 2012 presidential election, we've collected some of the best celebrity endorsements for each candidate, paired with video when available:
Endorsement Style: Pondering politics while washing dishes
Example: "It's a very different world now, and Mitt Romney is a very different candidate, one with the vision and determination to cut through business-as-usual politics and finally put this country back on the path to the zombie apocalypse."
Endorsement Style: Tackling deep issues over a ginseng-drink launch party
Example: "I just think employment is really important. So, as of now, Mitt Romney."
Endorsement Style: Shouting to a captive audience — fans at a concert
Example: Vote for a "black Muslim in the White House," he's "fighting for gay rights, so support the man."
Endorsement Style: In song, of course
Example: "The man needs to understand Putin and Russia. So I want you to know that there is one man who will stand tall in this country and fight the storm and bring the United States back to what it should be — Gov. Mitt Romney!"
Endorsement Style: Non-Kumar at the Democratic National Convention
Example: "Nothing really compares to what I saw behind the scenes at the White House when I had the honor to serve for two years as President Obama's liaison to young Americans."
Endorsement Style: Slyly suggestive, à la "Girls"
Example: "Your first time shouldn't be with just anybody, you wanna do it with a great guy. It should be with a guy with beautiful … Someone who really cares about and understands women."
Endorsement Style: Holding hands with wife, Gena
Example: “If we look to history, our great country and freedom are under attack. We’re at a tipping point and, quite possibly, our country as we know it may be lost forever if we don’t change the course in which our country is headed.”
Endorsement Style: Appealing to the "white voters" on "Jimmy Kimmel Live"
Example: "For the first two-thirds of his life, Barack Obama was known as Barry, which is the third whitest name behind Cody and Jeff."
Endorsement Style: Full of apologies to Obama at a Romney rally
Example: "I am very proud to say that we had elected our first black president; I’m sorry — I’m sorry he didn’t do a better job, I really wish he would have — I do, but the facts are the facts."
Endorsement Style: Op-ed on the Huffington Post
Example: "I'm going to go with my optimistic side here (sorry, cynics, you know I love you) and imagine a Second Term Obama (and a Democratically controlled Congress) who will go after all the good that our people deserve and put the power of our democracy back in our hands."
Endorsement Style: On Fox News Channel's "Fox and Friends"
Example: “America is a business and should be run by a businessman”
Cee Lo Green
Endorsement Style: A takeoff on his hit "Fuck You" — complete with gestures
Example: You'll have to listen to this one on your own
Endorsement Style: Former porn star offers support while partying at a strip club
Example: "When you're rich, you want a Republican in office."
Endorsement Style: Invoking Stewie at TheGrill, TheWrap's annual media conference
Example: "I think, at this point, Obama could walk out onto the stage with his penis out [and] he's still going to win."
Endorsement Style: Twitter
Example: "Time for Republicans to unite behind Gov. Romney, a great leader who can win the White House and rebuild our economy for all Americans."
Cher & Kathy Griffin
Endorsement Style: A plea to women with a hint of snark
Example: "Romney and his buddies are trying to turn back time on women's rights."
Mr. Burns of "The Simpsons"
Endorsement Style: In a segment posted on YouTube
Example: “There's only one thing that might deny us the presidency that is the god-given property of the Republican party."
Endorsement Style: A seven-minute documentary
Example: "Even though I support the president, to me it’s much more interesting to encourage people to engage than to suggest that people should model themselves on me and my views.”
Endorsement Style: Gonzo-style interviews with a host of news outlets
Example: "Mitt Romney is either going to vow or not vow no more gun restrictions, can I expect you to live up to your word no more restrictions on our second amendment? He said 'absolutely.'"
Alyssa Santiago and Colin Sylvester contributed to this report.