1. A couple weeks ago I mocked the idea of a David Fincher Facebook movie. I stand corrected with the revelations that Ben Mezrich’s book “The Accidental Billionaires”, on which the script is based, is a wall-to-wall chronicle of New Media/New Money vulgarian excess and bitter betrayal. But there’s one Caligula-style outrage that, as an Australian, leaves an incredibly sour taste in my mouth -- Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg went aboard the yacht of a Sun Microsystems executive to dine on koala!
You heard me.
Australia’s harmless little marsupial was eaten by dot.com douchebags keen for an extreme cuisine thrill.
The koala, in case you don’t know, is cuddly, lovable and harmlessly spaced-out due its eucalyptus-leaf diet. But, most importantly, it’s an endangered species. To put it in context, it’d be like Russell Crowe celebrating an Oscar victory by sitting down to a dish of baked Liza Minelli.
I wonder how this little guy feels about it.
2. One kid from the Harry Potter series of films comes down with swine flu. A hundred headline writers give thanks for a “Hog-warts” joke. Another Harry Potter supporting actor gets busted for growing marijuana, setting up any number of “Pothead” gags.
Is Warner Bros. orchestrating these kids’ punny dilemmas for PR purposes?
This just in: Emma Watson shows her underpants at premiere! Brace yourself for innumerable variations on: “What’s On, Not Much!”
Amusing how this never once happened to Emma before she was legal. Also funny that she demurely told David Letterman “I’m still learning this stuff” – that’s because if there’s one thing this girl is good at it, it’s learning. She’s one of the smartest young women in Britain.
3. Speaking of smart women, if I could be any place right now, it’d be in Florida, watching Paris Hilton defend herself in the $8.5m lawsuit alleging she didn’t fulfill her promotional duties for the 2006 movie “National Lampoon’s Pledge This!”
I’m one of the eight people on the planet who’ve sat through this stinker start to finish and it’d be fantastic to see Paris testify about it in court. This is a film in which she observes her little pooch watching a bathroom threesome and remarks “My dog is such a perv, I love it – now I’m craving sushi” and refers to her on-screen boyfriend Simon Rex as “babydick”.
4. Still on court cases, the one between Pauly Shore and Sacha Baron Cohen over whether the latter’s “Bruno” ripped off the former’s “Adopted” with the whole African-baby adoption satire.
I reckon this trial could be a nailbiter and end with gasps from the public gallery as Brangelina enters to deal with them all! At the very least, it might inspire Shore to make that “Jury Duty” sequel we’ve been clamouring for.
