Ryan didn’t bother too much with the BS this week, no doubt due to the time issues that have been plaguing the show. They didn’t even have time to feature a mentor for the Donna Summer -- oops, I mean “disco” themed show. I guess Ms. Summer doesn’t have anything to promote.
Instead of boring us with the kids regaling us with tales of how they chose their songs, Seacrest jumped right into it, announcing that someone was about to sing “I’m Every Woman.” Well, that gave it away right there. Who else would be singing that song besides ...
Lil Rounds: She’s so predictable! The judges keep saying things like, ‘You’ve definitely got a voice.” While I’m wishy-washy over whether that’s true, what I do know is that I wouldn’t rush out and buy her album. Simon predicts that she’ll be one of the two to leave tonight. If there’s any justice in the world, he’s right. In fact, it should’ve been her performing for her spot last week instead of the ubertalented Matt Giraud.
Kris Allen: Earned love from the judges with his breezy, acoustic rendition of “She Works Hard for the Money.” Paula made some metaphor about Kris “shopping in the women’s department” for songs, then accused Simon of wearing ladies’ underwear. Then somehow Kutie Kris got accused of it. I mean, do we really have time for this? (And, more importantly, how do you think Paula knows that about Simon?) Randy said that the thing he loves about Kris is that he knows who he is. Yes, we all do. He’s a hotter Jason Mraz.
Danny Gokey: Did one of the funnest -- and most repetitive -- disco songs ever, “September” by Earth, Wind & Fire. It was just alright for me, dawg. Paula thinks he has a sexy voice. I think he sounds like Michael McDonald, which I don’t equate with sex. Sexy or not, there’s no way he’s leaving before the Top 3.
Allison Iraheta: Put a rock spin on “Hot Stuff.” While the judges (and I) were not crazy about the arrangement, at least it stayed true to who she is trying to be as an artist. No schizophrenia, a la Anoop and Matt. She truly is the strongest singer in the competition, with the possible exception of (yes, it pains me to say it) Glambert. Too bad she doesn’t seem to have the star quality to make it to the end.
Adam Lambert: Disappointed before he even opened his mouth. I predicted last week that we’d see him in a white “Saturday Night Fever” leisure suit, but he refused to indulge us. To add insult to injury, he even sang a song from “Saturday Night Fever": “If I Can’t Have You.” I know I probably stand alone, but this reminded me of his ridiculous performance of Cher’s “Believe” during Hollywood Week. He emoted and put his all into making it a ballad, but all I could hear in the background of my mind were the Bee Gees doing coke to a disco beat.
Matt Giraud: Did “Stayin’ Alive” -- appropriate since that’s exactly what he’s trying to do after singing for his life last week. He did his best funky Justin Timberlake impersonation, but Simon wasn’t crazy about it. With two contenders leaving this week, hopefully his talent will be enough to keep him around.
Anoop Desai: Sported a sexy 5 o’clock shadow for his sexy interpretation of “Dim All the Lights.” Unfortunately, it was very vanilla. despite that extremely “strawberry” shirt. It was neither slow nor fast, and the last note was really off. I think he may be in trouble.
It’s getting down to the nitty gritty now, folks. Because of last week’s Judges’ Save, we’ll be saying goodbye to two Idols Wednesday night. Lil has been on borrowed time for weeks, and it will be shocking if she doesn’t leave. As far as the second contestant to go, perhaps Matt’s fans got a wake-up call last week. Sadly, I think Anoop may be leaving us, unless there’s an upset and Allison (talented but unlikeable) is given her walking papers.
What do you think?