Why the Republican candidates are like a box of chocolates
"The Daily Show With Jon Stewart" returned Tuesday with an episode taped before the results of the Iowa caucuses — but even before Rick Santorum's close-second finish, Stewart was already mocking his sudden rise.
"Get the f— outta here," he joked. "Santorum? Really? Republicans are gonna try every chocolate in the box?"
Stewart then pullled out a box of chocolates to show that even though Republicans will taste an assortment of candies (the one representing Michele Bachmann had "too many nuts," he said), they're going to end up with "plain chocolate" Mitt Romney.
Stewart said that biting into Santorum's chococlate releases a gushy liquid — a reference to an unfortunate definition of Santorum's name that tops his Google results thanks to sex columnist Dan Savage.
"You have no idea how hard it is to clean up when you got Santorum on ya," Stewart said. "For the love of God, please do not Google that."
Watch Stewart sample chocolates: