Gwyneth Paltrow and Robert Downey Jr. making a documentary? Really?
Weighing in at just over three hours, the 84th Annual Academy Awards may have been shorter than most in recent memory — but that doesn't mean there wasn't room for trimming. Here are five moments we could have done without.
Also read: Oscars 2012: The Winners (Slideshow)
5: Was Emma Stone High?
As Emma Stone prattled on about how exciting it was to be a presenter, during her and Ben Stiller's mega-awkward, laugh-deficient presentation moment, you may have wondered, "What is she on?" Soon enough, though, the true scenario became apparent: She had been saddled with an inane skit that even her acting skills couldn't breathe life into.
The speech's would-be joke revolved around Stone wanting to put on a big production, and Stiller, as an Academy Awards veteran who last appeared in "Avatar" blue-face, arguing that it's better to cut to the chase. They should have followed Stiller's advice.
4: Gwyneth Paltrow and Robert Downey Jr.'s Fake Documentary
If Paltrow and Downey developed any chemistry during the filming of two "Iron Man" movies, it sure didn't come across during their clunker of a presentation speech, which saw Downey pretending to film a documentary about the presentation of an awards speech. The skit got one thing right, anyway — like 99.9 percent of documentaries, it was about as exciting as watching paint dry.
3) Academy President Tom Sherak
Dude … you're a robot, aren't you?
2: Longest Acceptance Speech for the Shortest Film
William Joyce and Brandon Oldenburg weren't too big on the short-and-sweet concept while accepting for their animated short, "The Fantastic Flying Books of Mr. Morris Lessmore." But then, you have to remember that these are the same guys who made a movie called "The Fantastic Flying Books of Mr. Morris Lessmore," so pithiness clearly isn't their strong point.
1: "If I See Myself on Screen, I Know That I Exist"
All those thoughtful quotes on being An Actor. Sample the above, from Gabourey Sidibe. These were spoofs on the self-importance that pervades Hollywood, right?