Yes, there's serious news out in the world –but Stephen Colbert recommends you go elsewhere to get it because his report is all about going gaga for Royal Baby.
It's time for another installment of "Sir Stephen Colbert Presents: Royal Afterbirth, Labour Party, Fetal Attraction, Birthing-hips hip hoorah, The Prince of Wails, Spotted Dick, It's a Boy! '013!"
Less than 24-hours after giving birth, Kate, William and the currently-unnamed Baby Cambridge emerged to greet the media and the world on Tuesday. And Colbert says that trendsetter Kate's post-birth look is the new standard for women. So step your game up, ladies.
William was amazing yesterday too. After all, he did drive the family home himself, which blew some broadcasters away.
Finally, "The Colbert Report" staff mocked up its own version of what the baby could look like if it had the queen's eyes, Prince Charles' ears and an Englishman's teeth. Hint: It's not pretty.
Watch the clip: