He's had huge business failures, cheated on his wife and ditched her for a much younger woman. He's never held elected office, his hair is a national joke and his weekly platform is a reality show.
For the moment, he's a one-issue candidate stuck on one of the most ridiculous issues of this or any campaign season.
Ladies and gentlemen, meet the next President of the United States: Donald J. Trump.
Absurd, you say? Maybe. But these are absurd times.
There are reasons to think that the real estate mogul-turned-reality television star, who was famously dubbed a "short-fingered vulgarian" by Spy magazine, may not be completely nuts to mount a serious race for the presidency in 2012.
After all, a bad Austrian actor with lots of his own baggage, Arnold Schwarzenegger, was elected governor of California. A professional wrestler, Jesse Ventura, got the top job in Minnesota.
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And the most prominent Republican in the race, Sarah Palin, got political traction not by legislative prowess or traditional leadership, but by spouting catchphrases and raging against the established ways.
In this climate, trading insults with Bill Cosby on the "Today Show" -- the way Trump did when the Cos dared to dismiss his candidacy -- qualifies as high-impact campaign strategy.
"Stranger things have happened," said TV writer/producer Phil Rosenthal, who demonstrated his knowledge of what Americans like with his TV show "Everybody Loves Raymond."
He added: "Although people with absolutely no qualifications at all -- in fact, negative qualifications -- have won the job."
There's plenty of reason to believe that Trump doesn't have much of a shot at landing the nomination, much less the presidency.
For instance: his record as a businessman, which will be central to establishing his qualifications -- in fact, it's essentially all that he has -- is not the sterling string of brilliant successes he'd have you believe.
His Taj Mahal resort in Atlantic City, funded largely with junk bonds, went into bankruptcy. His Trump Plaza Hotel was forced into Chapter 11 in the early 1990s, when his personal and business debt had grown to more than $4 billion; forced sales of prime New York property and restructured deals by his creditors kept him afloat -- barely.
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In 2009, after his resurgence, Trump Entertainment Resorts filed for Chapter 11, the second time his casino properties had done so. Around the same time, he was sued by Deutsche Bank for defaulting on a $40 million loan for the Trump International Hotel and Tower in Chicago. (He countersued, claiming that the recession was an act of God and he didn't have to pay.)
If he points to his inarguable business successes on the campaign trail, he'll also have to face his failures -- a prospect that might make it tougher to maintain his TV-fueled status as the Ultimate Businessman.
