As the show begins, we learn that "ast" is the word for love in Icelandic. *insert ass joke here* The boys are in the airport talking about love, Iceland, blah blah blah ... and already I’m falling asleep. Ali talks about the volcano erupting and how it was an exciting time to be there. Tell that to the airlines, Ali.
Chris is there, too, and he advises the boys of a group date, a one-on-one, and a two-on-one where only one of the two will be continuing this journey. For the one-on-one, the best love poem will get the special date. Bonus points will be given to he who can use an Icelandic word or two in the poem. Hmm, the boys are thinking, how can I use the word "Ast" in a poem without making reference to anything ass-related?
It's poem-writin' time, and the boys have one hour. Several of the dudes walk around town trying to get the locals to help them out with Icelandic words. We learn that this isn't the first time Frank has waxed poetic, so to speak. Yay -- commercial time already!
To recap the guys poetry would be an assault to your eyes and brain, so I'll just skim over the good stuff. Or ... not. There was no good stuff. I'll say it once again, however sad it is: I miss Wes. At least his cheesiness had sharpness to it. The boys have brought cheese to whole new level (with all apologies to the state of Wisconsin). Ali picks Kirk, and he's pumped to have won. And, yay, another commercial.
One-on-one
Kirk is already emotionally invested, and looks forward to bringing out his inner child for this date. They walk around town in matching outfits, and golly gee, they just look so cute together. Time to hit up a restaurant, where Kirk is definitely holding back. Ali isn't impressed with the stilted conversation, and I'm not feeling the love for this couple.
At the Hilton, the boys get the group date card: Roberto, Chris L., Chris N., Craig, and Frank are up. Which leaves Justin and Kasey for the two-on-one. This was not random, folks.
It's dinnertime for Kirk and Ali, and Kirk reveals that five years ago he was very sick, to the point of having to see about 40 different physicians. Turns out he was poisoned by asbestos in an uninhabitable college dorm. The guy seems like a good dude, but I am seriously having trouble remaining conscious throughout this episode.
After a pretty dramatic showing last week, this one is putting me to sleep. Even my wife, who is normally pretty drawn to this show, is snoring up a storm beside me. Anyway, Kirk's story actually inspired Ali, so he gets a kiss and a rose, but Seal is nowhere to be found. Back at the Hilton, Frank is consoling Kasey about his trepidation for the two-on-one.
Group date:
The guys arrive and Ali is waiting with a group of beautiful horses.
