'On the Day Before Christmas' -- A Temp Diaries Christmas Carol
December, 22, 2011 12:52 pm | Comments On #Christmas Carol, hollyblogs, Media, Temp X
It's the holiday season. And no one is more interested in celebrating this time of year than me, your humble host, Temp X.
While some people hate my musical numbers (although not as much as they hate my drunken Twitter posts on "Glee"), I can't help myself. Every time I go to the 99 Cent Store to blow my pittance of a paycheck, I get swept up in the Musak-inspired Christmas carols they blast from the COBY CD/cassette player behind Register No. 2.
So it is with this, I decided to write my own tune. It's to the tune of the "Twelve Days of Christmas." And I...
Read MoreKim Kardashian's Message to Her Fans -- I Found the Tracked Changes
November, 02, 2011 3:47 pm | Comments On #Kim Kardashian, kris humphries, marriage, Television, weddingBy now you've probably seen the open letter Kim Kardashian posted regarding her divorce from Kris Humphries.
It's a lovely letter that offers all the sentiment that one might expect from someone as worldly and well read as Kardashian's publicists Jill Fritzo and Noelle Keshishian at PMK*BNC.
Well, before every final copy, there's a rough draft. And my very secret sources tell me that Kim was insistent she give it a go herself, before her handlers cleaned it up and posted it.
Thanks to those same sources, I have uncovered that draft, combined with the changes that became the final break-up manifesto.
Enjoy...
"This is probably the hardest thing I've ever had to make my publicist re-write write. I see all of the (what's the word...
Read MoreHollyblog: The Best- and Least-Liked Hollywood Executives
October, 21, 2011 11:16 am | Comments On #MoviesThe Hollywood Temp Diaries has celebrated National Boss' Day with the release of its 2011 Brown List -- a ranking of the MOST-LIKED and LEAST-LIKED entertainment executives. This is the third-annual edition of the survey, which is designed to help job seekers to answer the question "Do I really want to work for [Hollywood Executive]?"
Topping the "Most Liked" group is George Furla of Emmett/Furla Films with 748 nominations. Also cracking the Top 10 are Rob McEntegart (Sr. EVP Lionsgate Films), producer Bernie Goldman ("300"),...
Read MoreHollyblog: Make Your Own Nikki Finke Photo
February, 09, 2011 11:02 am | Comments On #draw your own, Media, nikki finke, photoSo much going on in the world of Nikki Finke. She's turned journalism on its ear by rerunning press releases at a record clip (91 since 1/1/11). She's busy with the Jobs section of her site ("Coming Soon" since 2009). And now, the only person with fewer known photos than blues legend Robert Johnson (below right) is in the news for ... gasp ... having her picture taken.
It appears that News Corp's The Daily has a secured current snapshot of the old bird. The wrinkle is she doesn't want it out there. Was it a bad hair day? Anyway, according to The Wrap, she's so cheesed off...
It's White-Man-Palooza at the Hollywood Reporter (corrected)
November, 16, 2010 2:33 pm | Comments On #Media, The Hollywood Reporter
(Note: I have revised this posting to reflect the gender imbalance of the Reporter's story. I mistakenly said the Young Guns were a fairly balanced 18 men to 17 women. The correct number is a much more embarrassing 24 men to 11 women (not including the additional categories of talent and writers/directors). I sincerely apologize for my error.)
The release of the cover of this year's Hollywood Young Guns -- the "Top 35 under 35" entertainment execs -- seems to be missing something. I can't put my finger on it.
Let's see. The lighting is fine. The outfits look nice. I'm pretty sure they're all under 35 (although in Hollywood, that's...
Read MoreHollywood's Most- & Least-Liked Execs? Survey Says ...
October, 19, 2010 10:36 am | Comments On #MediaThe day you hoped for/feared is here. The 2010 Brown List, a survey conducted by the Hollywood Temp Diaries to find the Most-Liked and Least-Liked entertainment executives is complete. A few interesting stats:
·Total nominations increased 400% over last year to nearly 4,500 submissions.
·The winner of the Most-Liked executive won with 445 nominations, almost 30 times the votes James Waugh got last year when he was crowned king.
·Irony Alert: Kevin Spacey, who played supreme Hollywood jerk Buddy Ackerman in “Swimming with Sharks,” actually made the Most-Liked list.
·The "winner" of the Least-Liked executive garnered 1,117 nominations, nearly 20x what Randall Emmett received last year when he won the...
Read MoreHow to Beat the Variety.com Paywall
March, 31, 2010 4:51 pm | Comments On #paywall, Temp X, Variety.com(Update, Friday 11 a.m.: Well, Variety figured out how to foil our system. We'll update if we come up with their new IP address.)
I am not a computer hacker. The last computer programming class I took was Pascal, and I think I got a C.
That's why I am as shocked as you are that I figured out a very simple way to bypass Variety's new subscription thingy.
For those of you unfamiliar with what I'm referring to, Variety recently changed its website to a subscription model.
That's probably a smart thing. People are increasingly getting their news online. The ad market is soft. And money doesn't grow on trees.
But if I can figure out how to access your site without paying for it, you need to hire smarter programmers.
Enough of the preamble. Here's how you bypass the subscription.
1. Go to Variety.com and click on any...
Read MoreBennie Awards: Recognizing the Worst in Reality Television
February, 22, 2010 4:36 pm | Comments On #Awards, Hollywood Temp Diaries, jay leno, Jersey Shore, Jon Gosselin, reality TV, Snooki, Spencer Pratt, Television, Temp X, The SituationThe Hollywood Temp Diaries has announced the winners of the reality/nonscripted division of the 2009 Bennie Awards, recognizing the worst in primetime TV.
In what can only be seen as a tremendous upset, Jay Leno beat out Jon Gosselin, Spencer Pratt and "Jersey Shore's" The Situation for Worst Male Personality.
"I'm stunned," said Temp X, the legendary creator of the Hollywood Temp Diaries. "Leno's behavior in taking back 'The Tonight Show' was loathsome and shameful and his show was dreadful, but to say he's worse than the unwanted Ed Hardy model Jon Gosselin, the irrepressible cheeseball Spencer Pratt or Mr. Abs-on-feet The Situation is nothing less than shocking."
Perhaps foretold by Mr. Leno's upset, "The Jay Leno Show" triumphed in the Worst Show category over an imposing...
Read MoreSnooki Done Killed the Video Star
February, 11, 2010 3:03 pm | Comments On #Jersey Shore, Madonna, MTV, TelevisionIt was with little fanfare that MTV changed its logo, hacking the "Music Television" portion off the iconic image.
This should come as no surprise to anyone, as MTV hasn't shown a music video since the second Clinton administration. Its programming today consists of teenage mothers, silly dating shows and, its new programming sensation, "Jersey Shore." But regardless, for those of us who fondly recall going over to Jon Kasem's house and watching "Yo! MTV Raps," this was a major event.
The Hollywood Temp Diaries could only think of one way to honor this moment -- with a song.
MTV's first video was the Buggles' "Video Killed...
Read MorePlease, Don't Sully the Pristine Reputation of Barbie!
September, 25, 2009 1:47 pm | Comments On #Barbie, Laurence Mark, miley cyrus, universal 
The Mayans assure me that the world is going to come to an end in just a few short years. To that I say, "Bring it on!" I'm actually hoping that due to some miscalculation (i.e., not accounting for Leap Year, abacus problems) will push that date forward to -- oh maybe -- tomorrow?
Now you're probably wondering what has Temp X worked up to the point that he's rooting for the end of the world as we know it. To that I have three simple words -- "Barbie the Movie."
That's right. Everyone's favorite...
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Description
Temp X is a writer, producer and a one-time stand-up comic toiling in underemployment. He is the self-anointed King of Hollywood and the mind behind the wildly popular (or so I'd like to think) blog, http://www.tempdiaries.com. The site chronicles his experiences as a temporary assistant in Hollywood. He makes $16/hr working for a CBS subsidiary, but that assignment ends in a week. He can be reached at tempx@tempdiaries.com.
