Is ‘Survivor’ Russell Really Driving the Bus?

Or are Natalie and Jaison just making it look like he’s the puppetmaster?

Well, it’s just around the corner. No, silly, I don’t mean Christmas. I’m talking about Sunday’s “Survivor” finale!  It’s even bigger news than Snooki getting punched in the face by a guy down at the “Jersey Shore” or the season premieres of “Paranormal State” and “Psychic Kids: Children of the Paranormal.” (Actually, I may be the only one who cares about those last two.)

Thursday night’s episode left me with a lot of questions.  For instance, what’s a “prayer warrior?”  Those two words just don’t seem to go together. And, honestly, I really doubt if Jesus cares whether you win the reward challenge or not, Natalie. (Unless you were planning on converting those “savage” host Samoans, of course.) Save your prayer wars for things of substance … like immunity challenges.

Speaking of immunity, Brett won it again this week. Seriously, where did this guy come from? I’d heard him utter about three words until last night, when he recited a whole big verse from Ephesians. (Not a rock band, as I previously thought.)  

I think the only reason he is the last Galu left is that everyone forgot he was there in the first place! While the Foa Foa Foursome has been scrambling around making allies and enemies, Brett has gotten this far by doing seemingly nothing (besides winning a couple of timely immunity challenges, of course.)

No one could have predicted that the Final Five would be 80 percent Foa Foa, and this works in his favor. If he makes it to the finals, he actually has an excellent shot of winning, even though his strategy has been simply building relationships (and “pray warring,” of course).

As for Shambo’s untimely departure?  I’m not sure why they got rid of her, other than the fact that Russell was offended by her halitosis. She would’ve been as loyal to Russell as she has been to her 23-year-old mullet. As Probst said, “That’s commitment to a hairstyle!”  

True, Mick will probably have a better chance of winning immunity against Brett, but who wouldn’t want to go up against defector Shambo in the end when the jury is made up of Galus? Don’t feel too badly for her, though. “What I most wanted to do in Samoa was be part of that cultural experience with the native tribes here,” she said. Really?! More than winning a million dollars? That’s what you most wanted to do in Samoa?

Mission accomplished, I guess.

Now, I am no “strategist.” (My failed choices in the “Choose Your Own Adventure” book series will attest to this.) But I’m not sure why Mick keeps saying he should “make a big move” instead of actually making a big move. Perhaps he has been waiting until the Immunity Idol is out of play. I thought that the biggest move they could’ve made tonight was to oust Russell. Call it a hunch; I had a feeling he would not play that Idol, and I was right!

Speaking of my darling Russell, I’m wondering how long the others are going to let him drive this bus (not that I’m complaining). They blindly do as they’re told and not one of the Foa Foa Foursome has ever thought to get rid of him. If the jury votes on who was truly played the best game, I think that there’s no contest.

I was worried that his cockiness would be his downfall, especially after he told Mick that he was a millionaire. But it seems to keep pushing him along. Who else would gamble with a million dollars by not playing the Immunity Idol? And who else would make it common knowledge that he has an Immunity Idol (make that three Idols) at all? He said it himself: “They say don’t get confident in this game. You know what? I’m confident as hay-ull.”

As for Natalie and Jaison, it will be interesting to see who makes it the farthest. As we learned in the premiere, looks can be deceiving. Russell may look like he’s the puppetmaster, but perhaps these two are making sure that he’s the one who looks like the bad guy.

Remember, Natalie is the only remaining member of Russell’s “dumbass girl alliance.” She doesn’t seem so dumb now that she’s in the Final 5, does she? 

And if Jaison makes it to the finals, his law experience will definitely give him a leg up in closing arguments.

Russell has outwitted but Brett has outlasted.  I’m excited to see how it plays out as far as outplaying.  Who do you think deserves to win?