'Chernobyl Diaries' Review: Creepy, Spooky and Altogether Nuke-y

May, 25, 2012 1:56 pm | Comments On #Alonso Duralde, Bradley Parker, Chernobyl Diaries, Jesse McCartney, Movies, oren peli, reviews

“Chernobyl Diaries” isn’t going to do the Russian National Tourist Office any favors, but it’s a solidly suspenseful (if somewhat disposable) horror movie that makes a haunted house out of a real-life disaster area.

Even if the attractive characters, and the order in which they die, feel like the kind of cookie-cutter stick figures that were so effectively spoofed in “The Cabin in the Woods,” first-time director Bradley Parker (working from a script co-written by “Paranormal Activity” creator Oren Peli) understands that suggesting is scarier than showing, and confusion generates more suspense than...

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'Moonrise Kingdom' Review: Wes Anderson's Sad-Tweens Tale Engaging, Deadpan-Funny

May, 23, 2012 10:15 am | Comments On #Alonso Duralde, Bill Murray, Bruce Willis, Edward Norton, Frances McDormand, jared Gilman, Kara Hayward, Moonrise Kingdom, Movies, reviews, roman coppola, Tilda Swinton, Wes Anderson

Get past the fonts (Futura bus logos! Everyone knows calligraphy!) and the ’60s pop songs, and you’ll find that the real recurring motif in Wes Anderson’s films is “Melancholy Childhoods of the Vietnam Era.” This auteur can’t get enough of sad kids wistfully reading novels with intricately painted dustjackets, listening to records on plastic tone-arm record players and dreaming of liberation.

Not for nothing does one of the flashbacks in “The Royal Tenenbaums” reference E.L. Konigsburg’s “From the Mixed-Up Files of Mrs. Basil E. Frankweiler,” a 1967 tale of two precocious but...

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'Men in Black 3' Review: Will Smith, Tommy Lee Jones Drag Down a Cool Party

May, 22, 2012 10:51 am | Comments On #Alice Eve, Alonso Duralde, Bill Hader, Bo Welch, Emma Thompson, Etan Cohen, Jay Redd, Jemaine Clement, Josh Brolin, Ken Ralston, Men In Black 3, Michael Stuhlbarg, Movies, reviews, Rick Baker, Tommy Lee Jones, Will Smith

It’s a look that the parents of recalcitrant teenagers know all too well, that grimace that says, “You can make me go to this piano recital, but you can’t force me to look like I’m enjoying myself.” We get some version of that face quite a bit from Will Smith and Tommy Lee Jones in “Men in Black 3,” a sequel that seems to indicate that, a decade after their last onscreen outing, these two stars are strictly here for the paycheck.

Which is a pity, since there’s a zippy and clever movie going on all around the two lumps with their names above the title. Just like that piano recital, however, you’ll enjoy yourself more if you’re paying attention to what’s happening while ignoring the sourpuss in the corner.

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'What to Expect' Review: All the Appeal of Pickles and Ice Cream

May, 17, 2012 3:01 pm | Comments On #Alonso Duralde, Anna Kendrick, ben falcone, Brooklyn Decker, Cameron Diaz, Chace Crawford, Dennis Quaid, elizabeth banks, Jennifer Lopez, Kirk Jones, Matthew Morrison, Movies, rebel wilson, reviews, Rodrigo Santoro, Wendi McClendon-Covey, What to Expect When You're Expecting

It’s said that the only reason women are capable of giving birth more than once is that they forget about the pains of labor once it’s all over. Here’s hoping that audiences unfortunate enough to see “What to Expect When You’re Expecting” undergo a similar bout of amnesia.

This insipid comedy uses the best-selling pregnancy guide as a jumping-off point for multiple overlapping storylines, almost all of them banal, trite and hackneyed. Strangely enough, the only memorable moments of this mess come when things get serious, despite the track record of director Kirk Jones, who demonstrated most recently with...

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'Battleship' Review: Sheer Adrenaline Keeps Dopey Action Epic Afloat

May, 17, 2012 1:40 pm | Comments On #Alexander Skarsgard, Alonso Duralde, Battleship, Brooklyn Decker, Erich Hoeber, Hamish Linklater, John Hoeber, liam neeson, Movies, Peter Berg, reviews, Rihanna, Taylor Kitsch

As a defender of the 1985 comedy “Clue,” I can’t automatically reject the idea of basing a feature film on a board game. But the game Clue comes with characters and a plot and a house. Battleship comes with a grid and boats and pegs.

All those things turn up in “Battleship,” a big, loud, stupid Hollywood movie that winds up looking all the better by virtue of not being as elephantine and deafening and moronic as a Michael Bay “Transformers” adventure. Peter Berg and writers Erich and John Hoeber aren’t interested in nuance or character or wit, but they imbue the movie with enough adrenaline and...

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'The Dictator' Review: Laughs Keep Sacha Baron Cohen's Shaky Regime Afloat

May, 15, 2012 10:39 am | Comments On #Alec Berg, Alonso Duralde, Anna Faris, Ben Kingsley, David Mandel, Jason Mantzoukas, Jeff Schaffer, Megan Fox, Movies, reviews, sasha baron cohen, the dictator

“The Dictator” tells a fish-out-of-water story about a Middle Eastern despot forced to live among New York’s common folk after an assassination attempt, and Sasha Baron Cohen is swimming in new shallows himself.

This time out, though, the writer-performer has created a full-on narrative, rather than foisting creations like Borat and Brüno onto unsuspecting civilians in a mockumentary.

As it turns out, a scripted Baron Cohen isn’t quite as fun to watch as one who’s madly improvising in potentially dangerous situations. But for all the movie's messiness and lack of conviction, Baron Cohen makes so many of his gags stick to the wall that it’s easy to forgive the film’s many flaws.

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'Where Do We Go Now?' Review: Political Tale Can't Figure Out If It's a Satire

May, 11, 2012 12:02 pm | Comments On #Alonso Duralde, Movies, Nadine Labaki, reviews, Where Do We Go Now?

Oscar prognosticators were flummoxed when “Where Do We Go Now?” won the audience award at last year’s Toronto Film Festival -- previous winners like “Slumdog Millionaire” and “The King’s Speech” had turned the prize into an Academy Awards bellwether. But this Arabic-language film (with smatterings of Russian and English) didn’t exactly fit the mass-market profile of its predecessors.

Mainstream audiences heading out to see “Where Do We Go Now?” in its regular release may find themselves similarly confounded, but for entirely different reasons.

Director and co-writer Nadine Labaki has set out to...

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'God Bless America' Review: Dark Satire Curdles into Cranky Rant

May, 10, 2012 3:10 pm | Comments On #Alonso Duralde, Bobcat Goldthwait, god bless america, Joel Murray, Movies, reviews, Tara Lynne Barr

It’s one thing to object to a movie on philosophical grounds, but something else entirely when you agree with most of what a filmmaker has to say but still find the finished product tedious and irritating. That was my experience with Bobcat Goldthwait’s latest, “God Bless America,” a tedious would-be satire with all the subtlety of a car alarm and only a few more laughs.

It’s a revenge fantasy for anyone who hates reality TV and the general coarsening of the culture — “Falling Down” for NPR listeners, basically — but even if you stand with Goldthwait’s feelings on the subject, “God Bless America”...

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'Dark Shadows' Review: It's Not Just the Vampire That Sucks in Tim Burton's Retread

May, 10, 2012 9:30 am | Comments On #Alonso Duralde, Bella Heathcote, Chloe Grace Moretz, Dan Curtis, Dark Shadows, Eva Green, Helena Bonham Carter, John August, Johnny Depp, Jonny Lee Miller, Michelle Pfeiffer, Movies, reviews, Seth Grahame-Smith, Tim Burton

The original idea of a Tim Burton-directed “Dark Shadows” certainly must have seemed like a good one on paper, with the master of mass-market Goth applying his imagination and a Hollywood budget to the infamously on-the-cheap, Dan Curtis-created cult soap opera that ran from 1966 to 1971 on ABC before spawning various film and TV follow-ups.

And then, when early trailers revealed that Burton was making a comedy with humor springing from an 18th-century vampire’s confusion in the mini-skirted world of 1972, it appeared that Burton would be returning to his “Beetlejuice” roots, mining laughs from the supernatural.

But now we get the movie itself, which turns out to be not particularly funny and not at all scary, with characters so barely defined that they would work only in a spoof of the material. (Which brings us back to the “not...

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'The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel' Review: A Sweet and Funny Fantasy for Retirees

May, 03, 2012 4:25 pm | Comments On #Alonso Duralde, Ben Davis, Bill Nighy, Celia Imrie, Dev Patel, John Madden, Judi Dench, Maggie Smith, Movies, Oliver Parker, Penelope Wilton, reviews, Ronald Pickup, The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel, Tom Wilkinson

From “A Room with a View” to “Enchanted April,” it’s been a movie truism that British people have to leave Britain if they want to unshackle themselves from their soul-crushing Britishness. And so we have “The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel,” in which a handful of pensioners set off to retire in India, where they learn life lessons, fall in love, and get a second chance at being useful.

It’s basically a feel-good fantasy for the Rascal set, but “Marigold” proves itself rather hard to resist, from the colorful, sun-soaked delights of Jaipur (as captured by cinematographer Ben Davis) to a cast of heavy-hitters who...

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Alonso Duralde has written about film for Movieline, Salon, MSNBC.com. He also co-hosts the Linoleum Knife podcast and regularly appears on What the Flick?! (The Young Turks Network). Senior Programmer for the Outfest Film Festival in Los Angeles and a pre-screener for the Sundance Film Festival, he is also a consultant for the USA Film Festival/Dallas, where he spent five years as artistic director. A former arts and entertainment editor at the Advocate, he was a regular contributor to "The Rotten Tomatoes Show" on Current. He is the author of two books: "Have Yourself a Movie Little Christmas" (Limelight Editions) and "101 Must-See Movies for Gay Men" (Advocate Books).

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