Hollywood Week on “American Idol” is not about singing; if you’re interested in that, check out your local opera. If it’s drama and schadenfreude you seek, however, then you’re in the right place. The fun of these episodes is in pushing contestants to their breaking points. What usually end up breaking, by the way, are voices and hearts. In the case of people like Tatiana del Toro, though, there could be a complete “alleged” breakdown of all mental facilities.
For this second round of Hollywood Week auditions, the remaining contestants (approximately 100) were asked place their “Idol” dreams in the hands of their competition. They put themselves in groups of three or four and stayed up all night learning their songs and choreography. This resulted in a perfect storm of exhaustion and histrionics, which, as we know, makes for great TV. Song selections included “I Want You Back” by The Jackson 5 (NOT, unfortunately, N*Sync), “Mercy” by Duffy and Fleetwood Mac’s “Don’t Stop Thinking About Tomorrow.” Not that the music really factored in much to last night’s episode. The stage performances weren’t even showcased until the 30 minute mark, which left the rest of the hour to be filled with tantrums, “f*** you”s and guttural crying.
‘IDOL’ KEEPS YOU UP ALL NIGHT
The real treat of last night’s show was witnessing the middle-of-the-night ups and downs of three groups: Team Compromise, Team Diva, and, uh, the no-name one led by Tatiana del Toro. You may remember del Toro as the girl who earned a Golden Ticket in San Francisco, despite looking like a deranged flamenco dancer and having the whinnying laugh of a mare in heat. Well, same laugh, same psychosis. When she felt her group wasn’t coming together the way she had hoped, her paranoia set in, causing her to tell the cameras that they were throwing her under the bus and were “going to humiliate” her. She then tried to leave the group to join Team Compromise, featuring Nathaniel “it’s on my skin” Marshall. This would be a pairing made in ratings heaven; alas, Tatiana left Team Compromise and was welcomed back to her original group by Muna Hiluf and two other nameless, plain-looking girls.
Team Compromise consisted of: Nathaniel; Nancy Wilson, the lady sporting the red clown ringlet weave; and Kristen McNamara, whose hair color of bleached blonde, brunette and pink could best be described as “Neopolitan.” Team Compromise, who had begrudgingly decided to work with Tatiana, was confused when she went back to her original group. This confusion turned to anger for Clown Weave and as she tore into Tatiana, Nathaniel stated in a (shockingly) calm voice that there was no need “to get that dramatic.” Pot, meet kettle. Cut to Marshall less than three minutes later as he lets out his trademark wimpering and an Emmy-worthy “It’s not just your dream at stake here!” in response to a disagreement between Clown Weave and Neopolitan. Neopolitan just wanted to rest her voice for the next day’s audition but Clown Weave thought it was more important to rehearse.
