Charlie Sheen Tour Coming Soon to a Town Near You?

“Two and a Half Men” actor launches a road jaunt to share “the real story” behind his recent antics

Finally: Your chance to be stuck in a room with Charlie Sheen.

Relieved of his "Two and a Half Men" duties, Sheen has launched a live tour, "Charlie Sheen: My Violent Torpedo of Death/Defeat Is Not an Option Show." The actor explained the concept of the production — sort of — on a Ticketmaster page.

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"My Violent Torpedo of Truth/Defeat Is Not an Option Show is coming for you," he said. "I'm going on the road. LIVE. 

Will there be surprises? Will there be guests? Will there be mayhem? Will you ask questions? Will you laugh? Will you scream? Will you know the truth? 

This IS where you will hear the REAL story from the Warlock. Bring it. I dare you to keep up with me."

So far, only two dates have been announced, on April 2 at Detroit's Fox Theater, and April 3 at the Chicago Theater. Tickets for both shows go on sale Saturday.

The shows, according to the Ticketmaster page, are "FOR MATURE AUDIENCES 18+ OVER."

Perhaps one of his "goddesses," porn star Bree Olson, is serving as Sheen's opening act?