Jimmy Kimmel pretended to be impressed with Nikki Haley’s showing in the Nevada Republican primary this week, where she won just 31% of the vote despite being the only real candidate.
The winner of that primary, by 63%, was “none of these candidates,” meaning Haley, Kimmel joked, “finished second to none.” Zing.
“You know, all eyes this week are on my hometown of Las Vegas , Nevada. The Super Bowl is there on Sunday, yesterday was the Nevada primary, the Nevada caucuses are tomorrow,” Kimmel said during his monologue. “I only wish Siegfried and Roy have been alive to see this, they would have really loved it.”
“Donald Trump was not on the Nevada ballot, for the primary. Nikki Haley was. Nikki Haley ran basically unopposed in the Republican primary. And somehow still lost,” Kimmel continued. “‘None of these candidates’ got 63% or 62% of the vote, Haley just got just over 30% of the vote.”
“You know how they say, ‘you’re second to none?’ She finished second to none,” Kimmel added.
“I like the idea that people took time to wait in line to vote for ‘None of These Candidates.’ This is like going to the Wendy’s drive thru and yelling “nothing for me, thanks,” Kimmel said. “By the way this race is shaping up, ‘none of the candidates’ is probably the only thing America can agree on right now.”
Watch the whole monologue above now.
Leave a Reply