Bill Clinton may have waited until his second term to get around to it, but the former President of the United States promised Jimmy Kimmel he did use executive power to investigate Area 51.
“I had people go look at the records for Area 51 to make sure there was no alien down there,” Clinton said Wednesday during his first appearance (above) on Kimmel’s ABC late-night show. “People thought that because everybody who works there has to stop about an hour away and put on special clothing, and that’s because a lot of our stealth technology is made there. We know that now, but there are no aliens there.”
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Clinton got curious about the long-rumored government conspiracy when the 50th anniversary of the infamous Roswell UFO crash rolled around in 1997.
“I knew we’d get gazillions of letters, so I had all the Roswell papers reviewed. Everything,” Clinton added.
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Rest assured, however, the 42nd POTUS believes that the truth about little green men — or whatever extraterrestrial visitors may look like — is still out there. Clinton said he believes the “ever-expanding universe” with “billions of stars and planets out there,” some of which have been spotted by “fancy telescopes” just outside our solar system, “makes it increasingly less likely that we’re alone.”
“If we were visited some day, I wouldn’t be surprised,” Clinton said. “I just hope that it’s not like ‘Independence Day.’”
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On second thought, Clinton philosophized that a destructive invasion directed by Roland Emmerich could be just what this country needs.
“It might be the only way to unite this increasingly divided world of ours,” Clinton added. “Think of how all the differences among people on Earth would feel small if we felt threatened by a space invader. That’s the whole theory of ‘Independence Day.’”
Here’s another theory: Clinton has secretly replaced Will Smith in “Independence Day 2” and is already hard at work promoting it.