‘The View’: Gun Violence Debate Yields Tampon-Based Solution

“Who would want to use a Fresh Balance to kill somebody, I ask you,” co-host Michelle Collins says

Michelle Collins has found a cure for the wave of gun violence plaguing our nation.

Collins revealed her master plan on Thursday’s episode of ABC talk show “The View,” offering a novel approach to making assault weapons unappealing.

“I had an idea of how we can actually lessen the use of assault weapons in this country. I think we need to start naming them after tampons,” Collins offered. “I have some examples. Imagine leaving your house with your Pocket Pearl. Or loading up the Gentle Glide. I feel like men who like assault weapons, we have Fresh Balance.

“Who would want to use a Fresh Balance to kill somebody, I ask you,” Collins continued. “Not me. And I think that actually is the one way to stop certain people, especially, from buying AK-47s.”

“View” maven Whoopi Goldberg brought her own thoughts on the topic, which luckily didn’t involve feminine products. According to Goldberg, the people using assault weapons aren’t run-of-the-mill criminals, but rather perpetrators of mass violence.

“When you think about who’s carrying the assault weapons … it’s not folks who are hanging you up in the park. They’re not carrying these,” Goldberg said. “These are carried by people who are taking out movie theaters, who are going to schools with these things.”

As for what the government can do to protect its citizenry, Goldberg offered, “What is the government supposed to protect you from? Sandy Hook didn’t come from another country. That came right out of here. Connecticut came out of here. Colorado came out of here … So what is the government supposed to do?  Because it seems to me, you know, you want to ban people, you want to ban a people from coming, you want to build a wall? How about an assault weapon wall? Let’s build a wall about that.”

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