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Guess Who’s Finally ‘Passed Off’!

Oddly, no mention at all Wednesday night of the overtime glitch that left DVR viewers out in the cold for Glambert’s performance. But they did seem to have time for Seacrest to yet again make fun of Simon’s age. Isn’t that joke getting old? Apparently Frankie Avalon’s “Venus” was on the top of the charts […]

Oddly, no mention at all Wednesday night of the overtime glitch that left DVR viewers out in the cold for Glambert’s performance. But they did seem to have time for Seacrest to yet again make fun of Simon’s age. Isn’t that joke getting old?

Apparently Frankie Avalon’s “Venus” was on the top of the charts when Simon was born and so they showed a clip of him singing it ….

Wait a minute! Is that Frankie Avalon singing the very same song 50 years later on the “Idol” stage? Why, yes it is. He must have a “45” dropping soon. Simon insists they made a mistake: “Venus” came out in 1959, and he says he was born in 1969 but, of course, he was lying.

The long-awaited group lip-sync number was from the year “Idol” was “born” in the U.S. — 2002. Actually, I’m not 100 percent sure that the long-awaited group lip-sync number WAS lip-synced this time.

Kylie Minogue’s “Can’t Get You Out of My Head” kicked off, with Lil Rounds doing a strange come-hither dance move and then darting out of frame. Either they were singing live — badly — or the recording engineers just gave up after it became clear that Lil would not learn to harmonize in tune.

Either way, what an odd choice for a group number — not exactly a showstopper or a tune that showcases vocal prowess. Perhaps the producers thought the Idols could handle learning a group number if there were minimal words to memorize. Word Memorization A+; Actual Singing: C-.

Next was the Ford music video to Britney’s “Circus!” Woo-hoo! How current! Granted, it was a little odd to hear a tenor-heavy version of Britney, but the guys’ glitter eye makeup more than made up for it. (By the way, I can’t wait to see Brit Brit lip=sync the same song next Thursday at the Staples Center!)

Glambert thanked Simon for Tuesday’s standing ovation. Matt Giraud thanked the mayor of Kalamazoo. I’d like to thank Paula for speaking coherently.

Glambert, Kris and Anoop were in the hot seat first. Frontrunner Glambert was safe, of course, even with the DVR glitch, as was Kris. Anoop landed in the Bottom Three after giving what was arguably his best performance to date. Dammit! I blame myself for neglecting to vote. I hope Anoop will not bring this up in couples counseling.

Someone called “Flo Rida” (rhymes with “low rider” but looks suspiciously like a state name) performed.

At first I was appalled because I thought this song was about oral sex! Can you imagine? On a family show? Sample lyric: “You spin my head right round, right round when you go down, when you go down down.”

Thankfully, I overreacted. (Focus on the Family and the FCC, there is no need to return my calls.) The song is just about patronizing strip joints. Sample lyric #2: “From the top of the pole I watch her go down; She got me throwin’ my money around.” Whew!

After everyone rid themselves of their lustful thoughts, it was time to kill a few more dreams. Danny was safe, as was Matt, despite being the victim of Seacrest’s cruel double talk (“As you know, you’ve been in the Bottom Three before, and I’m afraid, Matt, tonight, you’re gonna have to deal with the stress … of staying in the competition.”).

Ryan announced that Scott was in the Bottom Three. He walked him across the stage and “passed him off” to Anoop.

Next up were the last two girls, Allison and Lil, who joined the Bottom Three for the first time. After considering the Bottom Three, Simon mentioned that there was definitely one who might be worthy of a Save. Methinks he meant Lil, though Anoop has more personality and control over his voice. I don’t think anyone thought he meant Scott.

Kellie Pickler performed.  She clearly learned a lot from “Idol.” Stuff like stage presence, personality and the importance of plastic surgery. (Thanks, Paula!) Vocals clearly weren’t on the curriculum.

Lil Rounds was sent back to safety.(Over Anoop? Really?) Seacrest then announced that it was Scott who was in trouble. He did a reprise of “The Search Is Over,” minus the guitar. It was far superior to Tuesday night’s version (until he tried to do the falsetto).

The drama came when Simon announced that two judges felt Scott should stay, while two thought he should go. Seacrest insisted they make a decision, and Simon told Scott he was out.

As “inspirational” as Scott is, I’m sure that Idols won’t miss guiding him around the stage or “passing him off” to one another.

The real victim in this is Vote for the Worst. They need to find a new mascot and fast!

I nominate Lil.