Stephen Colbert had a little fun during his monologue on Tuesday speculating about what else could be renamed for Donald Trump following some congressional Republicans’ attempt to rename the Kennedy Center after the president.
But before he declared that the Grand Canyon could be known as “Donald’s Gaping Hole,” Colbert joked that living in America these days is a lot like being the passenger in a car with a drunk driver.
“I read once that if you’re a passenger in an auto accident, it helps if you’re just a little drunk, because and this evidence of the science backs this up, if a drunk passenger is a little loose, and if you’re a little looser, you’re less likely to get severely injured than if you were to tense up right before impact,” Colbert said. “Which brings me to our president. I think at this point, it would help if you’re all just a little drunk, because maybe then, it wouldn’t be so painful when he drives the world into a telephone pole.”
“We all know that he’s crazy, but some of the crazy stuff is just to distract us from the crazier stuff. And maybe we should stop trying to stop every crazy, because stopping some of the crazy makes the crazy stuff seem less crazy than you could possibly craze. And let’s face it, let’s face it, if you think we’re going to stop all the crazy, you’re cray-cray,” Colbert continued.
Then he explained how some House Republicans want to rename the Kennedy Center.
“I’m sensing you don’t like that,” Colbert quipped when his audience booed.
“Clearly you are not eager to see Kid Rock dance ‘The Nutcracker,’ but the bill’s sponsor says that Trump is a patron of the arts and a staple of the pop culture landscape. I’m sorry, but it’s true, Trump is a staple of pop culture. Just last week, he was great on ‘South Park,’” Colbert added, referencing last week’s “South Park” season premiere that depicted Trump in a sexual relationship with Satan, and ended with a parody PSA mocking Trump and Paramount.
“Now it’s true that two months after Kennedy’s 1963 assassination, Congress passed legislation renaming the National Cultural Center as a living memorial to Kennedy. That was a long time ago. You know what they say about those who forget the past? They name stuff after Donald Trump. So let’s just rip the band aid off and rename everything. The Washington Monument will become ‘my big, pointy penis,’ and the Grand Canyon will become ‘Donald’s Gaping Hole,’” Colbert joked.
You can watch the whole monologue below: