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Conan O’Brien’s Australian Rules Football Career Ends Before It Begins (Video)

Stick to not-sports

The Sydney Swans were quite kind to let Conan O’Brien try out for their Australian Rules Football team. Good news: They probably won’t have to cut a veteran to make room for the TBS comic.

O’Brien went down under on the latest “Conan Without Borders.” While there, he explored the bush, the beach, and even learned some Aussie slang. One thing Conan probably regrets doing is trying out for the AFL squad.

He didn’t exactly excel at footy — but O’Brien did get some cool cleats for trying.

Though O’Brien lacked “athleticism,” “ability” and “desire,” per the Swans’ assistant manager, he also lacked a lot of other tools and attributes needed for the technical and physical sport. Thankfully, Louis took it easy on him during the tackling drill.

Watch the video above.

Don’t worry, Jordan Schlansky gets his.

Want to see more footage from Conan trying to fit into another culture? Below is that visit to the dangerous woods we talked about above. Cool vest, Coco.

Finally, you’ve got to speak the specific intricacies of our shared language to be taken seriously over there.

Watch the Team Coco video below to witness a very patient voice and dialect coach teaching Conan some local slang. He does about as well as you’re probably picturing.