Colbert Airs Kermit The Frog’s Ugly Contract Negotiations: ‘Do I Look Like a B—-?’ (Video)

Rainbows may be visions, but these nasty Kermit The Frog contract negotiations are truly a sight to behold. And unlike the meteorological phenomenon, the Muppet leader’s got plenty to hide.

On Tuesday’s “Late Show,” Stephen Colbert shared some shocking (fake) footage of Kermit’s angry back-and-forth with The Jim Henson Company and Disney brass. None of it was child-friendly.

“Gentlemen, we’ve worked together a long time and I think there’s something we all need to keep in mind as we enter into these delicate negotiations,” Kermit began. “I AM KERMIT THE FREAKING FROG! ALRIGHT? I WILL MAKE A ‘RAINBOW CONNECTION’ WITH MY FOOT IN YOUR A–!”

“Look, this all boils down to one question,” the puppet continued. “DO I LOOK LIKE A B—-? THEN WHY ARE YOU TRYING TO SCREW ME?!??”

The cotton amphibian then put a giant cigar out on his chest. Watch the video above.

Back in reality, Kermit The Frog puppeteer Steve Whitmire was fired last week after 27 years beneath Miss Piggy’s man. Brian Henson, chairman of the Jim Henson Company and Jim’s son, told the New York Times that Whitmire was “attacking everyone” in emails and letters. There are more off-camera allegations where that one came from — read all about the in-house (err, on-lily-pad?) drama here.