Stephen Colbert added his distinctively hilarious voice to those celebrating the Supreme Court’s same-sex marriage ruling in a new video.
“If you’re a homosexual and living in North Dakota, all your problems are solved,” the incoming “Late Show” host said.
“Wow, history moves fast,” Colbert continued. “It’s hard to believe that gay Americans achieved full Constitutional personhood just five years after corporations did.”
He also took aim at the dissenting opinion of Chief Justice John G. Roberts, saying gay couples should expect a card from Roberts at their wedding reading, “You guys are perfect for each other and a cancer on our democracy.”
Colbert also had fun at the expense of Justice Antonin Scalia, who said that if he were ever party to an opinion like the one Justice Anthony Kennedy wrote for the majority, he would hide his head in a bag. “I could have sworn he was already hiding his head in a flesh toned cinch sack,” Colbert said. “Please come on my show, sir.”