‘Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Road Chip’ Review: Sequel Runs Out of Steam Before Its Destination
Unfunny, unaffecting, unnecessary live-action film will nibble away at audiences’ patience quite quickly
Inkoo Kang | December 16, 2015 @ 4:00 PM
Last Updated: December 16, 2015 @ 4:02 PM
Sometimes a movie offers so little entertainment that I’m forced to make my own fun while watching it. In the case of “Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Road Chip,” I asked myself a series of questions to resist succumbing to this fourth-parter’s mental-anesthetic effects, such as:
Which company seems to have paid the most for product placement? (“American Idol,” even though it’s only got one season left.) For how many seconds does co-star Jason Lee actually look awake? (Approximately three.) Will I always find Tony Hale bugging his eyes out like a demented pug hilarious? (God, I hope so.) In what alternate universe does this sequel take place, where audiences go gaga over a trio of singing rodents who sound like squeegees rubbing against a dirty car window in harmony? (No clue.)
Failing almost entirely at amusement, “The Road Chip” may be most useful as a lesson for children to be more discerning about their movie choices. (My screening contained quite a few kids, but little of their laughter.) The plot and the stakes hinge on two sticking points that could have been cleared up with a 30-second conversation, but our L.A.-based heroes have a South Beach luxury hotel to plug, so it’s off to Miami we go.
After being told that their surrogate father Dave (Lee) will probably ditch them in the woods after he gets married, Alvin, Simon, and Theodore (voiced by Justin Long, Matthew Gray Gubler, and Jesse McCartney, respectively) scheme to prevent their guardian from proposing to his girlfriend Shira (Kimberly Williams-Paisley). Dave’s nuptials to Shira would also make her teenage son Miles (Josh Green) their stepbrother — and he already treats them with the casual malevolence of a boy squishing ants out of boredom.
The problem with the furry threesome’s plan is that Dave plans to pop the question in Florida, which means that the chipmunks, even with Miles’ help, have quite a bit of asphalt to cover. A deranged air marshal (Hale) with an irrational grudge against Alvin and his brothers puts them on the no-fly list, then relentlessly pursues them on the ground where, he’s told repeatedly, he has no jurisdiction.
Hale would steal the picture were there anything to be stolen; listening to his voice rise in pitch as his frustration at the universe escalates, especially after getting walloped in the crotch by a chipmunk cannonballing through the air, is a small refuge from the nonstop noise that passes for diversion here. That wall of racket and clamor includes the Chipmunks’ shrill, unfeeling renditions of pop ditties like “Uptown Funk” and “Baby Got Back.”
To his credit, director Walt Becker (“Old Dogs,” “Wild Hogs,” “Buying the Cow” — that’s quite the animal-themed filmography) does allow a few veteran comedic performers — most notably Retta, Uzo Aduba, and Jennifer Coolidge — to eke out flashes of humor during their cameos. (Strangely, no such generosity is shown toward popular sitcom stars Anna Faris, Kaley Cuoco, and Christina Applegate, who play the Chipettes.) Bella Thorne also shows up so the chipmunks have someone to briefly and uncomfortably ogle.
I’ll admit I laughed at one of writers Randi Mayem Singer and Adam Sztykiel‘s many poop and fart jokes — the only one that was a genuine surprise, as opposed to all the cutaway toots that seemed to be there simply because the film’s reason for being is to supply constant stimuli.
More perfunctory still are the numbing dramatic arcs that the chipmunks and Miles undergo to embrace one another as friends and potential family. Perhaps it’s better to choose to be annoyed, since that’s at least a sensation, and “The Road Chip” is so full of unconvincing simulations of emotions that you may temporarily forget what feelings feel like. Numbness or irritation — pick your poison. If there’s another reaction that this cash grab is supposed to elicit, I certainly didn’t experience it.
30 Highest Grossing Animated Movies of All Time Worldwide
A look at top animated moneymakers as of May 2020, from "The Lion King" to "Zootopia." The numbers are not adjusted for inflation.
30. "The Incredibles" (2004)
Worldwide Gross: $633,019,734
In 2004, Brad Bird's first Pixar outing wowed audiences with complicated animated action scenes, cross-generational comedy and superhero mayhem.
Pixar Animation Studios
29. "Sing" (2016)
Worldwide Gross: $634,151,679
Illumination's animal-karaoke musical crooned its way onto the list.
28. "Moana" (2016)
Worldwide Gross: $643,331,111
Disney's Hawaii-set movie scored two Oscar nominations, for Best Animated Feature and Lin-Manuel Miranda's song "How Far I'll Go."
Disney
27. "Big Hero 6" (2014)
Worldwide Gross: $657,818,612
Disney's 2014 robot tale combined anime aesthetics, superhero action and Pixar's heart.
Disney Animation Studios
26. "Ice Age: The Meltdown" (2006)
Worldwide Gross: $660,940,780
Fox's 2006 prehistoric romp proved the success of the first was no fluke.
Twentieth Century Fox
25. "Kung Fu Panda 2" (2011)
Worldwide Gross: $665,692,281
With the franchise's skills proven, DreamWorks Animation gave the world another hit of comedy with this animated martial arts sequel in 2011.
Dreamworks Animation Studios
24. "Up" (2009)
Worldwide Gross: $735,099,082
The 2009 fan favorite demonstrated that original ideas with big emotions could make big money.
Pixar Animation Studios
23. "Monsters University" (2013)
Worldwide Gross: $744,229,437
Ten years after the release of "Monsters Inc," Pixar sent fans back to school in a 2013 prequel.
Pixar Animation Studios
22. "Madagascar 3: Europe's Most Wanted" (2012)
Worldwide Gross: $746,921,274
DreamWorks Animation's "Madagascar" series kept the studio afloat with a string of breezy successes, including 2012's third installment.
Dreamworks Animation Studios
21. "Shrek Forever After" (2010)
Worldwide Gross: $752,600,867
The big green ogre's final chapter dropped in 2010.
Dreamworks Animation Studio
20. "Shrek the Third" (2007)
Worldwide Gross: $798,958,162
Made in 2007, this sequel proved there was still some gas left in this fantasy mash-up comedy franchise.
Dreamworks Animation Studio
19. "Coco" (2017)
Worldwide Gross: $807,082,196
Directed by Lee Unkrich, this animated film captured everyone's hearts and even won the Academy Award for Best Animated Feature in 2018.
Disney/Pixar
18. "Inside Out" (2015)
Worldwide Gross: $857,611,174
Disney Pixar hit the home run again with this animated feature film about the emotions inside your head, starring Amy Poehler, Mindy Kaling and Bill Hader.
Disney/Pixar
17. "The Secret Life of Pets" (2016)
Worldwide Gross:$875,457,937
Universal/Illumination's story of dogs seeking out adventure while their owners are away charmed its way onto the list.
Profits abound for this 2012 fourth installment in the chilly prehistoric franchise, followed just behind it's predecessor.
Twentieth Century Fox Animation
15."Ice Age: Dawn of the Dinosaurs" (2009)
Worldwide Gross: $888,805,671
While other films have made bigger waves in the States, international sales have always returned big money for Fox's "Ice Age" franchise, proven again by the 2009 entry.
Twentieth Century Fox Animation
14. "Shrek 2" (2004)
Worldwide Gross: $919,838,758
DreamWorks Animation proved to be worthy Pixar competition with its successful "Shrek" franchise.
Dreamworks Animation Studio
13. "Finding Nemo" (2003)
Worldwide Gross: $940,335,536
"Finding Nemo" was something of a second-wind for Pixar, solidifying the company's place as the titans of modern animation.
Pixar Studios
12. "The Lion King" (1994)
Worldwide Gross: $968,483,777
Can you feel the love tonight for this Disney animated classic?
Disney Animation Studios
11. "Despicable Me 2" (2013)
Worldwide Gross: $970,761,885
Illumination's sequel managed to make more money than its predecessor and put the upcoming "Minions" spin-off into motion.
Illumination Studios
10. "Zootopia" (2016)
Worldwide Gross: $1,023,784,195
Disney charmed audiences in 2016 with its cop thriller pairing a rookie rabbit cop and a wily fox informant.
Disney
9. "Finding Dory" (2016)
Worldwide Gross: $1,028,570,889
The sequel to "Finding Nemo" swam right back into audience's hearts.
Pixar
8. "Despicable Me 3" (2017)
Worldwide Gross: $1,034,799,409
Illumination's follow-up -- featuring Gru's blond-haired brother -- became the franchise's biggest grosser.
7. "Toy Story 3" (2010)
Worldwide Gross: $1,066,969,703
Built on Pixar's critical and commercial goodwill, the third installment in the mega-franchise brought in big profits.
Pixar Studios
6. "Toy Story 4" (2019)
Worldwide Gross: $1,073,394,593
Nearly two decades after the last film, Woody and Buzz and the gang returned for the top-grossing film in the series (not adjusted for inflation, that is).
Disney
5. "Minions" (2015)
Worldwide Gross: $1,159,398,397
The little yellow helpers crossed the $1 billion mark at the end of August, raking in more money then "Despicable Me" and "Despicable Me 2" for Universal Pictures.
Universal Pictures/Illumination Entertainment
4. "Incredibles 2" (2018)
Worldwide Gross: $1,242,805,359
The superpowered family sprung back into action a full 14 years after the original -- but far surpassed the original film's box office haul.
Disney/Pixar
3. "Frozen" (2013)
Worldwide Gross: $1,276,480,335
Disney's 2013 smash-hit takes the box office top spot. And then there was merchandising, video on demand and home video that audiences just couldn't let go...
Disney Animation Studios
2. "Frozen II" (2019)
Worldwide Gross: $1,450,026,933
Though it failed to garner an Oscar nom for Best Animated Feature, this sequel still managed to outgross its predecessor.
1. The Lion King (2019)
Worldwide Gross: $1,631,724,000
Whether the film is animated or live-action has been up for debate, the new "Lion King" was computer animated, so we're putting it on the list.
Disney
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Cartoon characters that cleaned up at the global box office, from “The Lion King” to “Incredibles 2”
A look at top animated moneymakers as of May 2020, from "The Lion King" to "Zootopia." The numbers are not adjusted for inflation.