Like a large number of you, Stephen Colbert watched Anderson Cooper’s interview with porn star Stormy Daniels Sunday on “60 Minutes.” And after hearing her account of the affair she says she had with Donald Trump, Colbert proclaimed her tale “the least surprising story I have ever heard.”
Speaking at the top of Monday’s episode of “The Late Show,” Colbert began by noting that the interview got the highest “60 Minutes” ratings since 2008. “They haven’t got ratings like that since Mike Wallace went undercover as a pole dancer.”
Colbert then mentioned the thing Trump himself might care the most about: “That means Stormy Daniels got higher ratings than Donald Trump did right after he was elected.”
“Wow,” Colbert smirked. “That’s gotta sting.”
Colbert then ran down the details of the story Daniels, real name Stephanie Clifford, told Cooper. Trump “had sex with a porn star, she spanked him with a magazine with his face on it, he didn’t wear a condom,” he said. “Later they watched shark week, then his lawyer paid her to keep his mouth shut, now Trump’s suing this porn star for 20 million dollars.”
“It’s an insane, salacious tale about a sitting president,” Colbert said, “and the least surprising story I have ever heard. That felt truer than him getting elected.”
Colbert then showed a clip of one of the most notorious parts of Daniels’ story — that she spanked him with a magazine, after which he became “more appropriate.”
“Hmm, a couple of spanks and Trump started acting more appropriate,” said Colbert. “John Kelly, you know what to do.”
Watch it below.
TONIGHT: Trump watched 'Shark Week' with Stormy Daniels thus confronting his two biggest fears: sharks and genuine intimacy. #LSSC pic.twitter.com/zrNNwcwPXO
— The Late Show (@colbertlateshow) March 27, 2018