In an amusing video clip during Thursday’s “The Late Show,” Stephen Colbert shined a light on a population that has been negatively impacted by the coronavirus shutdowns — cute little doggies.
Specifically, the sharp uptick in urban fireworks that has accompanied the shutdowns, and spawned numerous weird conspiracy theories in the process.
In the clip, a cute terrier talks to the viewer about “terrifying skyfire,” normally a dog’s least favorite part of summer that, thankfully for them, happens only once a year on the fourth of July. “But this summer, instead of one day, terrifying sky fire is every day,” the dog laments.
“We’ve become trapped in an unbreakable cycle,” the clip continued. “Outside to pee. The same food in the same bowl. My owner, always at home in the same clothes. And then, like clockwork, even though I don’t know how clocks work, the same terrifying skyfire.”
The dog then expresses desperation to escape the madness, and stumbles on a solution that has also worked for tons of humans: pornography. The dog pulls up a website called “Poochhub,” a pun on the real world “Pornhub.” The twist however is that Poochhub doesn’t show sex, it shows videos of very adorable doggies behaving badly.
“Oh yeah, they’re definitely not allowed to be up on that bed,” the dog says.
You can watch the whole thing below. Meanwhile, enjoy the fireworks that apparently are just always around now.
— A Late Show (@colbertlateshow) June 26, 2020