In the same way that websites have been set up to track baseball statistics, the government debt and the many public appearances by Justin Bieber through the world, some obsessive "Curb Your Enthusiasm" fan needs to create an online hub to document Larry David's ever-growing list of malfeasances against social convention.
As Sunday's season-eight premiere showed, David hasn't undergone much in the way of personal growth during his year-and-a-half hiatus. He's still exactly the same guy who has asked his Spanish-speaking gardener to address him using the tú form instead of usted and invited a sex offender to Passover dinner.
In "The Divorce" alone, he racked up a good 8 crimes against common decency.
Here's a list:
— Telling divorce attorney Berg that his desk seems designed to facilitate covert oral sex
— Telling Cheryl's divorce attorney that it's okay for bald people to call themselves that in the way that black people use the "n" word to address each other
— Attempting to coach a Girl Scout who stops by to sell him cookies about to insert a tampon
— Confronting his attorney about whether he's Jewish or not
— Reneging on his multiple-box order of Girl Scout cookies
— Slamming the door in the face of three Girl Scouts
— Yelling at a gang of Girl Scouts who return to collect
— Asking Cheryl if she wants to have sex while she's collecting her things at his house
We must have missed a few. Got any others?
As the season progresses, we'll make every attempt to update this list — but it would be great if a tech-savvy "Curb" nut would just create a stand-alone website already.