We've Got Hollywood Covered

Dancing With the Stars. And Dancing. And Dancing. And Dancing.

I mean, who really has five full hours to devote to the cha-cha this week?

I’m not sure who the target audience is for the new season of “Dancing With the Stars,” but apparently it is made up viewers with a lot of free time on their hands. Perhaps hospital patients or former “American Idol” judges? 


I mean, who else has five full hours to devote to the cha-cha this week? (I see you hiding there, “SYTYCD.”)

I’m sure I’ll get around to commenting on Donny Osmond’s agility eventually, but “DWTS” sparked something in me and I’ve just got to vent.

Don’t get me wrong. I love reality television. But the “more is more” trend of late is wearing thinner than the anorexic twins on “Intervention.”  

Quantity isn’t necessarily the issue here; it’s quantity without quality. I will readily admit that I am more than happy to devote a full day to a marathon of “Top Model” or “Paranormal State.” (I will also readily admit that “quality” is a subjective term.) But make me watch five minutes of an “American Idol” results show and I’m frustrated enough to flip a table, “Jersey Housewives” style.


These mega-episodes have more filler than Daisy de la Hoya’s lips!  

Then there are the “live” shows, like “Big Brother” or “I’m a Celebrity ... Get Me Out of Here!” Shows like that require at least three nights of television viewing weekly! If I wanted that kind of commitment, I’d still be watching “Days of Our Lives.”  

Even “The Real World” has gone from half-hour to hour-long episodes. (And, honestly, I could’ve done with knowing a lot less about those Cancun cast members.)

I can see allotting an extra hour here or there for popular premieres or finales. Fans are hungry for that. But every single week?

Then, of course, there’s the whole “DVR dilemma.”  Because you are a high-level executive at a major network, you probably don’t have a roommate. But if you did, you would no doubt encounter minor altercations over your obsessive need see all two hours of the “More to Love” finale. 


Add to that the fact that said fat people show overlapped with the (two-hour) premiere of another fat people show and the (two-hour) finale of “Big Brother” and you have yourself the start of a real squabble. 


Don’t even get me started on the fact that I have to watch “Glee” and “90210” online!

“So You Think You Can Dance” (or “So You Think You Can Squander Two Hours Tonight”) is the worst culprit. Did we really need a full two hours to watch four people perform? Adding insult to injury, Fox only gave us a month and two days to recover before they debuted yet another cycle of the show, a cycle that I, quite frankly, have yet to see because I’m so exhausted from the last one. (Mike Darnell & Co., take a lesson from “Project Runway:”  Absence does make the heart grow fonder.)

Here’s hoping that as the contestant pool dwindles down on “DWTS,” the hours will as well.  But then again, I’d probably watch either way.