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Jimmy Kimmel Makes Fun of Pretty Much Everything About Those LA Earthquakes (Video)

And he wants a new Richter Scale

Last week’s L.A. earthquakes? Jimmy Kimmel didn’t feel a thing. He’s also not feeling the Richter Scale, nor is he all that impressed by your sloshing-pool videos.

On Monday, ABC’s “Jimmy Kimmel Live” returned from a two-week vacation with much to talk about. Still at the top of everyone’s minds, of course, were last week’s 6.4 and 7.1 magnitude earthquakes, which both had epicenters in Ridgecrest, California.

“We had not one, but two major earthquakes here in Southern California,” Kimmel began Monday night’s monologue. “One of which was so strong that Kawhi Leonard somehow wound up on the Clippers.”

So did Paul George — some earth-shaking stuff, indeed.

“This Richter Scale makes no sense,” Kimmel went on. “Why not just do it on a scale of 1 to 100? If it’s 1, it’s nothing, if it’s 100, you’re dead.”

Or: “Make it like Yelp,” Kimmel suggested. “After the earthquake, we as a group decide what number to give it.”

He also had no love for the ever-changing earthquake-preparedness advice. Do you get in a doorway or under a table? Which part of the table?

“Don’t worry, we’re all fine,” Kimmel wrapped up the natural disaster portion of his monologue. “We have our yoga mats to protect us.”

Watch the video above.

Thankfully, there were no fatalities from the 4th of July Weekend quakes, which makes all of this much easier to laugh about.