Matt Damon, Ben Affleck and Chris Evans weren’t the only Hollywood stars making a joke out of the NFL’s “Deflategate” scandal on Thursday — Jon Stewart mocked the media for comparing it to Watergate, or Benghazi with “Ballghazi.”
“I don’t know if those are the appropriate nicknames for something this serious,” the “Daily Show” host said. “I’m going to go with ‘the Ballocaust.'”
While Stewart clearly does not think the football controversy is worth all of the coverage the media is giving it, he did pile on New England Patriots coach Bill Belichick and quarterback Tom Brady for their flimsy excuses.
Stewart called Belichick’s scientific explanation blaming “atmospheric conditions” for lowering his team’s balls air pressure “made-up bullshit sports physics” and caught Brady in a lie that he doesn’t want anyone taking any air out of the game balls.
In an excerpt from a radio interview in 2011, Brady says: “When [Rob Gronkowski] scores — it was like his eight touchdown of the year — he spikes the ball and he deflates the ball, which I love that, because I like, you know, the deflated ball.”
While Stewart seemed sure the guilty parties are “both” Belichick and Brady, he explored surveillance video footage showing a locker room attendant “drunk on his own power” taking the game balls into a bathroom before the start of the AFC Championship, during which the Patriots dominated the Indianapolis Colts.
“Of course they have video evidence, but this being the NFL, my guess is they won’t try to find the video for several months,” Stewart joked.
That wasn’t the worst jab the Comedy Central personality had prepared for the NFL. Stewart gasped at reports that Seattle Seahawks running back Marshawn Lynch would be fined half a million dollars by the league if he skipped media day. What’s worse, Stewart contended, is Lynch possibly being fined for wearing a hat during interviews that wasn’t approved by the league.
“How is it that this guy’s facing international drug cartel penalty money, but the owners and commissioner of the league have no obligation to address stadium financing shenanigans, or concussions, or domestic violence policies. Please tell me this is the stupidest iteration of the NFL’s f–ked up priorities?” Stewart said. “It’s just classic NFL to be more worried about what’s happening on top of the player’s head, than the damage that’s going on inside it. It explains their slogan, ‘The National Football League: Worrying About the Wrong Shit Since 1920.'”