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Kimmel Invents a Pretty Good COVID Vaccine Branding Approach (Video)

He also still wants to meet the Nicki Minaj swollen COVID vaccine testicles guy

We’ve been dealing for months with selfish people who refuse to get vaccinated against COVID-19 and, as a result, are directly responsible for hundreds of thousands of needless deaths. But on Wednesday’s episode of “Jimmy Kimmel Live,” the host stumbled on a branding solution that might get at least a few of those lunatics to stop harming their communities.

He also repeated his call to meet the still-unidentified Trinidadian man Nicki Minaj claims experienced severe swelling of the testicles after taking a COVID-19 vaccine. And frankly, we agree.

But first, COVID branding. Kimmel kicked off his monologue by talking about the impending start of flu season and urged viewers to get vaccinated against it. And that’s when he brought up his (admittedly) pretty good idea.

“You know, I was thinking about it — for years, people have just been getting the flu shot. It wasn’t a big deal. And I think that’s because we call it the flu shot and not the flu vaccine,” Kimmel said. “Even though it is a vaccine. ‘Vaccine’ sounds controversial now, whereas shot just sounds like something you do on Spring Break.”

“I think I just solved COVID,” Kimmel continued.

Then he moved on to the news that after 18 months, YouTube has finally decided to crack down on the spread of dangerous lies about COVID-19 and vaccines. And that’s how Kimmel got to the Nicki Minaj guy again.

“You know, YouTube is finally doing something to slow down the vaccine misinformation train,” he said. “They are removing major anti-vaccine propagandists from the platform to prevent them from continuing to spread false information. Better 18 months late than never, I guess.”

“So far YouTube has banned more than 133,000 videos that contain COVID misinformation. Which sounds like a lot of videos, but at least half of those were about Nicki Minaj’s cousin’s friend’s giant balls,” he continued.

“And where are those balls? I demand to see them. That’s a loose end that needs to be tied up,” Kimmel joked. We agree, by the way. 

Surely you remember the whole saga, but if not, long story short: On Sept. 13, Minaj announced she wouldn’t be going to the Met Gala because of the event’s vaccine requirement. Then, after getting clowned by thousands online, she claimed that her cousin in Trinidad won’t get it because of his friend, the aforementioned man with swollen testicles. She continued to tweet through it, at one point falsely claiming she’d been suspended from Twitter. It was, uh, a lot.

Experts, by the way, unanimously say her story is false. COVID-19 vaccines do not cause side effects associated with common STDs.

Anyway, back on Sept. 16, Kimmel invited Minaj and the (almost certainly not real) unidentified man to appear on his show to clear the whole thing up. Alas, she didn’t accept. But maybe this time?

Kimmel also talked about the NBA’s problem of anti-vaccine players and the congressional conservatorship hearings inspired by Britney Spears. You can watch the whole monologue above.