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Colbert Interrupts Coronavirus Hiatus to Deliver ‘Late Show’ Monologue From His Bubble Bath (Video)

Welcome to ”The Lather Show“

Stephen Colbert interrupted the coronavirus pandemic-forced hiatus of “The Late Show” on Monday to deliver a monologue from the safest possible place he could find: a bubble bath in his own home.

“Welcome to my bathroom, I’m your host Stephen Colbert. You’re watching a very special ‘social-distancing’ edition of ‘The Late Show,’ or as I now call it, ‘The Lather Show With Scrubbin’ Colbert.’ My first guest tonight, as you can see, is Mr. Bubble, followed by a musical performance by the legendary duo, Head & Shoulders.”

Yes, the CBS late-night host is “coming to you from a secret ultra secure tub” location to give you the “Late Show” content you need in these trying times, though he was going to use his “rich person bunker, but it turns out the guys from ‘Parasite’ are living down there. Really nice, folks.”

Colbert, who much like all his late-night host colleagues has been forced to halt tapings of his program for the time being, then goes on to try to inform and comfort his audience as best he can about the current state of COVID-19, a storm the CDC is saying might go on for the next eight weeks.

Rippin’ his jokes from the headlines, as per usual, Colbert mocked U.S. residents who are reportedy stocking up on guns and ammo out of fear: “No! You can’t shoot a virus! The thought of frightened Americans arming themselves to the teeth scares the crap out of me — and there is no toilet paper left!”

Colbert also took a shot at NYC Mayor Bill de Blasio, who was seen working out at his YMCA on Monday morning before ordering all gyms in the city to shut down.

“Don’t you know that during an epidemic it’s fun to stay at your H-O-M-E. ‘Cause if you don’t we’ll be D-E-A-D,” Colbert sang to the tune of, well you, you guessed it. “You can talk to yourself, you can water your planets, you can walk around without pants.”

Last Thursday, “The Late Show” announced it was canceling a week of tapings amid COVID-19 concerns, with a spokesperson for the show saying that the network will “continue to monitor the situation closely with plans to return on Monday, March 30.”

Watch the clip above.