The Results Show: 2% Filler, 98% B.S.

And the Bottom 3? They all should have gone home LAST week

Last Updated: March 18, 2010 @ 6:37 AM

We’re all used to the fact that the “AI” elimination shows are 90 percent filler, but last night’s show was 2 percent filler and 98 percent B.S.

That’s right, despite veiled promises from Ford Fiesta (own one and have hipster paintball fights with your friends!), there was a lack of excitement and an even bigger lack of taste when it came to guest performers.

Interestingly enough, this week’s Bottom 3 was composed of contestants who should’ve been cut last week: Paige Miles, Tim Urban and Lacey Brown. It continues to infuriate me that the eliminations of Lilly Scott and Alex Lambert have not been addressed by the judges. The fight to get Alex back on the show continues; in fact, the creator of the “Bring Back Alex” petition emailed me personally and wants you to check out the latest.
It was announced that, for the second year in a row, the Judges’ Save could, well, save an Idol who was facing elimination, up until the Final 5. Last year, the panel used it on (one of my personal favorites) Matt Giraud. The problem is that, in this lackluster season, I’m not sure there’s anyone worth saving. The Save is meant to compensate for the audience’s disregard of major talent. As far as I’m concerned, a good bit of the major talent has already left the building (Lambert, Scott, Katelyn Epperly and even Todrick Hall).
Is there still hope for a Wild Card round?
Most of the blogoshere now agrees that the competition comes down to Crystal Bowersox and Siobhan Magnus, and I can’t see the judges using their “Save” on anyone else. Then again, I can’t foresee a situation where they would need to use it on these fan favorites.
So, who got the boot last night? Well, think about it. Dreamy Urban’s got the tween (and cult-like “Urban Family”) vote going for him. As for Miles, the advantage she has is that she is the only true R&B contestant left in the game. You could argue, of course, that Michael Lynche is also an R&B artist but then … you would be a racist because Lynche has repeatedly shown his versatility by singing several lame white-guy “jam” songs.
That, of course, leaves Brown, who became the latest person voted off of “American Idol.” While Brown’s performance this week was not awful, she has been singing on borrowed time for a few weeks now.  I’m sure that we’ll hear more from her in the future via the country or Christian markets. (Those people will embrace anyone!) 
As for how her elimination will affect the competition … I have a feeling that her participation was causing a split in votes between her and Didi Benami. Both have the underdoggish singer/songwriter thing going on, and now that Lacey is gone, I have a feeling that her fans will send their votes Benami’s way.
As for the last night’s guest performers, David Cook proved again exactly why he was voted the Idol and Aussie artist Orianthi proved that you can perform a minor song on a major network … as long as you can prove you were around Michael Jackson in his final days. (See: “This Is It” & Michael Jackson Memorial Service)
As for Ke$ha? Well, this Gaga wannabe provided the Idols with perhaps the greatest lesson of all: that you can be a major superstar with no talent, as long as you have great producers. Even the Bottom 2 seemed to have difficulty masking their disdain for this skanky “talk-singer.”
I only hope that Idol features true artists in its future guest spots this season. You know, people like Demi Lovato and Justin Beiber.