On this week’s “Saturday Night Live,” John Cena joined Vanessa Bayer and other cast members (including Beck Bennett and Kyle Mooney) as a game show host with a little more than most. While hosting “Hook a Hunk,” Cena (as host Ryan Mack) managed to draw the attention of Bayer (as the bachelorette, Michelle) — who was supposed to be choosing one of the contestants — in ways he didn’t intend.
The conceit of this dating game lasted all of ten seconds, as Michelle was so entranced by Ryan that she asked him out just moments after coming on stage. Check out the full sketch above.
“What are you doing tonight?” she asked.
“Well, I just have this thing to do for an hour, then I’m free,” Ryan replied. “You wanna grab food?”
“Sure, what kind of food do you like?”
Here’s where the contestants began to interject, attempting to talk to the girl they’d been promised to compete for. “Well, for me, my favorite food is strawberries, because I’m sweet and I like to jam,” one said.
While similar answers followed, Cena and Bayer became enraptured with each other, and their whirlwind conversation diverged into major tropes from old romance novels. Cena brought up a dead brother, for example.
“Oh my god, I’m so sorry,” said Bayer.
“His last words were ‘Find the right girl’,” replied Cena, whistfully.
The two completely forgot the other contestants by the end. “I feel like we’re the only people alive,” said Cena.
Frustrated and dejected, Bennett and Mooney ended up getting something similar to what they wanted when they signed up for “Hook a Hunk.” They didn’t get the girl, sure, but they did get a hunk — after commiserating with each other for a moment, they ended up making out.
Not everyone got a happy ending, though. The final contestant (Mikey Day) simply threw up his hands and wandered off as the on-stage makeout party went on.