Stephen Colbert entered the conversation surrounding Olivia Nuzzi and RFK Jr.’s alleged affair on Wednesday night with a series of jokes about the media/politics world’s high-profile scandal.
After introducing the story by calling the journalist a “female Handsome Squidward,” the CBS late night host mocked the “American Canto” author for her apparent taste in men.
“During their video calls he was often shirtless and she could see [his] toiletry bag filled with so many prescription drugs it could barely close,” Colbert read from a transcript of her book. “Look, miss, if you’re into shirtless older men carrying bags stuffed with pills… try the Port Authority bus terminal. It’s raining men.”
The “Late Show” star also broke down Nuzzi’s reaction to Kennedy’s brain worm, teasing the former pair for what he could only assume was their Renaissance Festival-style love language.
The comedian then ended the bit with a weather-related sex joke after Nuzzi’s ex-fiancé Ryan Lizza alleged that she and RFK Jr. had planned on consummating their relationship in August 2024 in Phoenix, Arizona: “Famously the most comfortable time to have sex.”
Elsewhere in his Wednesday monologue, Colbert made fun of the usual suspects — such as President Donald Trump, Donald Trump Jr., Melania Trump, Pete Hegseth and even that drunk bathroom raccoon. Watch the entire clip, above.
“The Late Show With Stephen Colbert” airs weeknights at 11:35 p.m. ET on CBS.
