Stephen Colbert lit up the crowd during the CBS upfront event at Carnegie Hall in New York on Wednesday.
The “Late Show” host roasted Donald Trump, Bernie Sanders and even parent network CBS. Colbert also declared his affection for advertisers: “I love [advertisers] and I knew I loved you from the moment I knew I needed commercials,” he said.
Colbert also made it a full minute without referencing Donald Trump, claiming that by doing so he “doubled CNN’s record” for avoiding the controversial GOP candidate.
Read some of Colbert’s best jokes below.
• “In the spirit of the upfronts let me be upfront: I love [advertisers] and I knew I loved you from the moment I knew I needed commercials.”
• “CBS is home to ‘Criminal Minds,’ ‘Scorpion’ and TV’s No. 1 drama ‘NCIS.’ That’s why, when people think of murder and dead hookers, they think CBS.”
• “Two thousand sixteen has been a big year for comedy. And if Trump wins, 2017 will be a big year for tragedy.”
• “[Trump] is slowly unifying the Republican party. All it took was there being no other options.”
• “I’m not supposed to talk about ‘The Walking Dead,’ but he is still running against Hillary Clinton.”
• “On my very first episode, I interviewed Jeb Bush for 12 minutes. That’s right, I had him on for half of his entire campaign.”