Stephen Colbert’s Big Bird Flips One Giant Bird to Ted Cruz

Proud owner of “Sesame Street’s” largest nest has a few new words for Texas senator

Big Bird is tweeting back at Ted Cruz — just not on Twitter.

On Monday’s “Late Show” cold open, Colbert and his staff of writers and editors manipulated some old “Sesame Street” footage to rip the Texas senator a new one after Cruz called Big Bird’s announced COVID-19 inoculation “government propaganda… for your 5-year-old.”

As is often the case on “Sesame Street,” Colbert’s Big Bird sung his way through the lesson on words. Not real words — or at least, not mashed together in this way — but words nonetheless, we suppose.

“AbsolutelystupidesttoolinallTexas/It’s the word that most appropriately fits/AbsolutelystupidesttoolinallTexas/You don’t quite do him justice with just dimwit/He’s got me, Big Bird, confused with Big Brother/when really he’s the big regret/if you just ask his mother.”

The song continues: “AbsolutelystupidesttoolinallTexas/Now, I don’t mean to wallow in the muck/but I just thought of another word for Ted Cruz/He’s a Totalsnivelingbeardedlittlef-“

That’s where Cookie Monster cuts Big Bird off to announce that “C” is for “censored.”

Watch the video above.

This weird and ridiculous beef all began on Saturday, when the *real* Big Bird, who is meant to be 6 years old, tweeted, “I got the COVID-19 vaccine today! My wing is feeling a little sore, but it’ll give my body an extra protective boost that keeps me and others healthy.”

The intention was to help kids ages 5 to 11 — who now have the option of receiving a relatively low dose of the Pfizer vaccine — feel more comfortable with the shot. Cruz (weirdly) took issue with that.

Naturally, Twitter had a field day with the moment. So did the women of “The View.”

“He clearly, clearly has never watched ‘Sesame Street’ and didn’t do any homework to find out,” Whoopi Goldberg said on Monday. “Because Big Bird has been talking to children about immunizations, and all kinds of things. So why you pickin’ on Big Bird, man? He’s trying to keep kids safe.”