10 Gawker ’20 Percent Nicer’ Headlines Restored to 20 Percent Meaner

TheWrap rewrites Nick Denton’s Gawker headlines a day after the site gets nicer

Gawker parody (Matt Dekneef)

Gawker founder Nick Denton promised a “20 percent nicer” website this week after a scandal that led to the removal of a nasty post about sex and the departure of the site’s two top editors. But can a nicer Gawker still be Gawker?

Thankfully, for at least one more day you won’t have to know the answer. TheWrap generously ran headlines from the site’s first day as a grown-up through a Gawkerator and meaned ’em up 20 percent, restoring them to the Gawker you know and love.

1. 20% Nicer: Michael Jackson’s Evil Dad, Joe, Had a Stroke in Brazil

20% Meaner: Michael Jackson’s Dad, Joe, Punches Ticket to Hell Like It’s Tito

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2. 20% Nicer: New GOP Hopeful Makes First Campaign Stop?

20% Meaner: GOP Clown Enters 2016 Race: “Trump’s Got Nothing on Me”

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3. 20% Nicer El Niño Probably Won’t Solve California’s Dire Drought

20% Meaner: Forecasters Predict No El Niño, Delicious California Jerky

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4. 20% Nicer: Kevin Johnson’s Cronies Trump Up Racism Scandal Against His Enemies

 20% Meaner: Sacramento Mayor Kevin Johnson Uses Racism to Cover Up Incompetence

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5. 20% Nicer: Your Dumb Twitter Jokes Are Yours and Yours Alone, Technically

20% Meaner: You Can Now Copyright Your Tweets, Because Everybody’s a Friggin’ Comedian

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6. 20% Nicer: Industrious Redditor Uses Toaster to Explain the Dangers of the Jews

20% Meaner: Jobless Redditor Hijacks Toaster Post to Bash Jews

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7.20% Nicer: 500 Days of Kristin, Day 183: Glamour by Istin Cavalla

20% Meaner: Stop Talking about Iran, Kristin Cavallari Has an Affordable Shoe Line

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8. 20% Nicer: Court: Female Athlete With Male Hormone Levels Has a Right to Compete

20% Meaner: Female Athlete With Male Hormone Levels Glands Historic Court Ruling

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9. 20% Nicer: I Am Cait Treats Everyone With Dignity, Including You

20% Meaner: E! Forgets It’s Trashy Kardashian Channel for 30 Minutes

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10. 20% Nicer: Gawker is Changing Its Name to The Ultimate Nice Website

20% Meaner: By Advertiser Demand, Gawker to Become “Go Fuck Yoursite”

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