“Saturday Night Live” produced their very own fairy tale that was a lot more realistic than it was a fantasy.
Host Felicity Jones and “SNL” regular Beck Bennett played the role of a princess and prince that are deeply in fairy-tale-like love — that is until Bennett finds out about his princess’ deep horrifying secret. Spoiler: Jones gains 15 pounds at nightfall. You can watch the full sketch above.
“I have a terrible secret. if you knew it, you’d never want to see me again,” the “SNL” host tells her prince dramatically.
However, Bennett insists that there is nothing that can keep him from loving her. The prince’s reassurance encourages Jones to continue spilling the beans.
“You see, my love, shortly after my birth I was cursed by a sorceress,” said Jones. “You see, as soon as night falls I — I become something else. I — transform.”
Now in regular fairy tale world, this “curse” would seemingly mean that the princess might transform into something like an ogre, a frog or something other terrifying or gross creature.
“I swear on one thousand lifetimes, that I will love you ’til the day I die,” said Bennett even after evaluating the fact that Jones could turn into a monster.
But even the prince’s wildest imaginings couldn’t prepare him for what the princess’ transformation was.
“Well, okay. I become — me, but fifteen pounds heavier,” Jones said exposing her secret.
Well, that was the deal breaker for Bennett. Relationship over.
However, the witch who cursed princess offered a way for the couple to break the spell — all it would take would be for the witch to make the prince’s penis a quarter of an inch shorter.
Neither of them would go for that, though. “No we can’t afford to lose that,” Jones’ princess replied to the offer.
“SNL” kicked off this week with Alec Baldwin returning with yet another appearance as Trump, lampooning Trump’s really intense first press as well as that whole golden shower rumor.