Two days of Snooki and The Situation, family drama of both the old-fashioned ("The Waltons") and mobster ("The Sopranos") varieties, "Real Housewives" of every location, and every episode "The Walking Dead" are but a few of the 63 TV marathons awaiting you and your hangover, er, post-NYE celebration fatigue, this holiday weekend:
FRIDAY
"Jersey Shore," 12:01 a.m.- 11 p.m. Saturday, MTV. You can kill off brain cells by over-imbibing on New Year's Eve, but this 47-hour marathon should render you just as senseless.
"Dual Survival," 9 a.m.-4 p.m., Discovery. The next time you're stranded on a windy ranch in winter, you'll think back to this marathon and think, "Wow, I sure wish I was carrying my ax and bison hide like those 'Dual Survival' guys advised."
Also read: 'Jersey Shore's' Snooki Sued for Allegedly Cheating on Her Business Partner
"CSI," 9 a.m.-2 a.m. Saturday, USA. A marathon of season 11 episodes, i.e. the last season starring Laurence Fishburne.
"101 Chowdown Countdown," 9 a.m.-2 p.m., Travel Channel. Among the must-nosh-at eateries on the countdown: Roscoe's House of Chicken 'N Waffles in Los Angeles and Katz's Deli in New York (yes, the "When Harry Met Sally" place).
"It Only Hurts When I Laugh, 11 a.m.-5 p.m., truTV. A skateboarding grandpa, a kid caught in a vending machine and a man who drives his car through a mall are but a few of the delights in this collection of people's most humiliating home videos.
"The Millionaire Matchmaker," noon-9 p.m., Bravo. Patti Stanger provides insight into how to find the perfect mate. Or what not to do to find the perfect mate. Either way, useful information here.
"'The Waltons' Gone Wild," noon-3 a.m., GMC. Not sure anything the Waltons did ever classified as "wild," but there are definitely worse ways to spend a day than with John-Boy, Jim-Bob and Mary Ellen.
"$100,000 Pyramid," 7 p.m.-midnight, GSN. The network kicks it old school with this game show, which paired contestants with celebs like Markie Post and Adrienne Barbeau. Look 'em up.
"House Hunters International," 7 p.m.- 4 a.m., HGTV. Turkey, Colombia, Mexico, St. Thomas, Vanuatu and Kuala Lumpur are among the foreign locales Americans visit while looking for a new home.
"Biography," 8 p.m.-5 a.m., Bio Channel. The "Harry Potter" kids and Ashton Kutcher get the bio treatment.
Also read: 'Harry Potter' Attraction Coming to Universal Studios Hollywood
SATURDAY
"The Rachel Zoe Project," 6-11 a.m., Bravo. These episodes all feature Zoe's former assistant, Brad Goreski … is it a coinkydink that Goreski's own reality premieres on the network this week? Nope.
"Top Gear Top 40," 6 a.m.-6 a.m. Sunday, BBC America. Like the title says, counting down the 40 best challenges presented on "Top Gear."
"Hillbilly Handfishin'," 9 a.m.-2 p.m., Animal Planet. Yes, people jam their hands into holes in the water in the hopes of pulling out a fish.
