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Colbert Demonstrates Why You Probably Shouldn’t Give Weed to Lobsters (Video)

Yep, stoner jokes incoming

To kick off “The Late Show” on Wednesday, Stephen Colbert used some recent lobster-related news as inspiration for a parody of those old “this is your brain on drugs” commercials. And the result is… well… we kind of have the munchies even though we didn’t smoke any weed.

For background: This week there were reports of a joint study — which we stress has absolutely not been peer-reviewed — by several universities including University of California, San Diego, to see if giving lobsters marijuana would ease their pain as they’re being cooked to death. The study was posted to a site called Biorxiv. Apparently, the researchers found that giving weed to the lobsters relaxed them but didn’t produce any other measurable effects. Guess nothing takes the edge off death.

Colbert kicked off the gag with footage of TV news coverage of the study, then went right into the parody. Only this time, the concerned adult says, “This is your lobster. This is your lobster on drugs.”

Then, we see two lobsters sitting in a pot of boiling water and holding huge joints in their claws. Commence a bunch of 1970s-style stoner jokes where the lobsters have a super high conversation about how they might die. At the end, instead of saying, “Any questions?” the concerned adult asks, “Who’s hungry?” Get it? (Also, we are.) Watch the clip below: