A vengeful witch using Facebook for mayhem generates zero scares — but plenty of unintentional laughs
Alonso Duralde | September 22, 2017 @ 9:29 AM
Last Updated: September 22, 2017 @ 12:25 PM
The silly but effective “Unfriended,” that 2014 thriller about a vengeful ghost killing off her high school tormentors one by one in a Skype chat room, was no classic, but it’s looking more like one when compared to “Friend Request,” an utterly idiotic movie that uses social media as a conduit for witchcraft and mayhem.
If nothing else, this supposed horror movie ranks among the most unintentionally funny films of late, starting with the periodic on-screen appearance of the heroine’s Facebook friend count as it spirals downward, which is presented as equivalent to the tragedy of a string of murders.
Maybe it’s a language thing: Director Simon Verhoeven (son of “The Nasty Girl” director Michael Verhoeven and actress Senta Berger) is making his first feature in English, and perhaps that would explain why even the film’s intended comic relief (two bumbling detectives who are in thoroughly over their heads as the body count climbs) are mishandled so badly that even the scenes that are supposed to be funny only generate laughs because they’re so very not-funny.
We’ll never know if it was Verhoeven or his co-writers Matthew Ballen and Philip Koch who came up with the kooky cops, or the scene where a death is declared a suicide even though there’s no body, or the campus memorial where two close friends are eulogized alongside a weirdo outsider just because they all happened to die on the same week. This is a movie that relies on Facebook as its motor, but the script must have been full of 404-Page Not Founds.
That weirdo outsider is Marina (Liesl Ahlers), a black-hoodie-clad loner at a California university where Laura (Alycia Debnam-Carey, “Fear the Walking Dead”) is a popular sophomore with a tight circle of friends and a hunky med-student boyfriend, Tyler (William Moseley, “The Royals”). Marina is in Laura’s psych class and has — gasp! — no Facebook friends, possibly because all she posts are creepy black-and-white drawings and animations involving spiky forests and evil mirrors. (If only she’d attended a college where even one other girl was taking fashion cues from Gollum and Marilyn Manson.)
Laura friends Marina on Facebook, and has a conversation with her after class, which turns Marina into Single Goth Female, constantly pestering Laura online with messages and video chats. When Laura blows off Marina on her birthday to go have dinner with Tyler and her pals, Marina kills herself.
(Or does she? Again, there’s a suicide video, but no body, although no authority figure in the film seems to think this merits further investigation.)
Marina — or her ectoplasm, or whatever — messages Laura, telling her she will know what it’s like to be alone, before killing off Laura’s pals and then posting gruesome videos of their deaths to Laura’s Facebook page, hence leading to her online friend attrition. Those videos can’t be deleted, and neither can Laura’s account (so Marina is either a powerful witch or a Russian bot) and it’s just all so tragic, except for the fact that Laura’s friends were all barely sketched-in to begin with (the sassmouth, the party dude, etc.) and the “kills,” as horror buffs like to call them, aren’t all that scary. (This is a very PG-13 kind of R-rated thriller.)
By the time “Friend Request” whips around to what it thinks is a shocker ending, you’ll already be thinking about where you parked and whether or not you want to refill your soda cup before leaving. Even die-hard opponents of smartphone usage in a movie theater will probably forgive anyone who would rather check Facebook than watch what’s happening on the screen.
13 Must-See Horror Movies After 'It,' From 'Green Room' to 'It Follows' (Photos)
"Starry Eyes" (2014)
Written & directed by Kevin Kolsch, Dennis Widmyer
Cool imagery, solid performances, and a harrowing take on how far a person will go to become a star.
Available to rent: Amazon Video, YouTube, iTunes
"Honeymoon" (2014)
Directed by Leigh Janiak
Janiak made a solid directorial debut with "Honeymoon." The whole film rests on the shoulders of the two leads with excellent chemistry who take you through a well-paced story of paranoia and freaky scares.
Available to rent: iTunes, Vudu, YouTube, Google Play Movies & TV
"What We Do in the Shadows" (2015)
Written & directed by Taika Waititi, Jemaine Clement
This film is a joyride of a horror comedy. This mockumentary stars all of your favorite monsters, and will make you smile with it’s charm.
Available to rent: Amazon Video, iTunes
"Goodnight Mommy" (2015)
Written & directed by Veronika Franz, Severin Fiala
I caught this out of Fantasia 2015, and was blown away. I admittedly shielded my eyes during the more torture-y parts at the end, but I didn’t see the twists, and it’s one of the most visually stunning genre films in recent years.
Available to rent: Amazon Video, YouTube, iTunes, Vudu, Google Play Movies & TV
"The Visit" (2015)
Directed by M. Night Shyamalan
Fun story: I was invited by my former boss Steven Schneider (and EP on the film) to a small screening, and he wouldn’t tell me what it was. I walk in and M. Night is there and only a couple of other people. I was so scared, and unfortunately was sitting in the front row so everyone could see me jump. I was over found footage, but I powered through that element because the story is so fun to watch unfold. Signature Shyamalan Twist works like a charm, and with this and "Split" getting great reviews it’s great to have M. Night back.
"Green Room" (2016)
Written & directed by Jeremy Saulnier
As a huge fan of "Blue Ruin," I was equally as impressed with how "Green Room" as a a brutally relentless thriller that is both tense and entertaining.
Available to rent: Amazon Video, YouTube, iTunes, Vudu, Google Play Movies & TV
The Guest (2014)
Directed by Adam Wingard.
I caught this on the big screen at Next Fest in 2014. Maika Monroe and Dan Stevens are captivating to watch. Period. It’s a quick-paced thriller wrapped into a poppy homage to throwback horror films.
"In Order of Disappearance" (2014)
Directed by Hans Petter Moland
I was lucky enough to see this at Fantastic Fest in 2014. It’s an intense Norwegian revenge story set against the beautifully snowy backdrop of Norway in winter. Tonally it reminded me of "Fargo" with added thriller elements and tense scenes.
Available to rent: Amazon Video, YouTube, iTunes
"Afflicted" (2014)
Written & directed by Derek Lee, Clif Prowse
I was pleasantly surprised by this film. Lee and Prowse put a unique spin on the well-tread vampire sub genre by giving the viewer an experience of what it’s like to make the transition into a vampire after you’ve been bitten by one. Shot on a very limited budget, the effects are impressive and mostly practical and they make great use of the docu-style filmmaking.
Available on Amazon Video, iTunes, Vudu
"Hush" (2016)
Directed by Mike Flanagan
Home invasion movie out of SXSW 2016. Reminiscent of "The Strangers" and "Wait Until Dark," it’s a very minimalist movie, and is intense, nonstop and entertaining. It’s low budget, but it doesn’t take away from the quality in this gem.
Available to rent: Netflix
"The Taking of Deborah Logan" (2014)
Directed by Adam Robitel
Jill Larson carries the film well in the title role that requires her to go from happy to sad to positively terrifying in the same scene. I wish it wasn’t found footage because I felt like that was one of the weak elements of it, but if you want to watch a possession film that won’t disappoint give this a look. I’m excited to see what Robitel does with "Insidious 4."
Available to rent: Amazon Video, YouTube, Google Play Movies & TV
"Under the Skin" (2014)
Directed by Jonathan Glazer
This film is gorgeous. It’s eerie. It’s an artsy take on "Species," and will gross you out as much as it will impress you with it’s visuals. It’s a very polarizing film, but the lovely Scarlett Johansson makes it work on so many levels. It’s sure to stick with you after viewing.
Available to rent: Vudu, Amazon Video, YouTube, Google Play Movies & TV, iTunes
"It Follows" (2014)
Written and Directed by David Robert Mitchell.
I’m sure you’ve at least heard of this film. A testament to its quality is that it’s one of the few films horror films to get an expanded release after doing high number in its limited run. Spooky soundtrack, 80’s vibes, and a new twist on the slasher sub-genre. Watch this in the dark. There are multiple gasp-worthy scenes.
Available to buy: Amazon Video, Google Play Movies & TV, iTunes
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"Starry Eyes" (2014)
Written & directed by Kevin Kolsch, Dennis Widmyer
Cool imagery, solid performances, and a harrowing take on how far a person will go to become a star.
Available to rent: Amazon Video, YouTube, iTunes