OK, we’ll skip the “winter is here” jokes and cut right to the chase, because we know what brought you here: the eighth and final season of “Game of Thrones” premieres tonight, and you have yet to finish that seven-season re-binge you definitely meant to start several months ago.
We understand, you’ve had a lot going on and suffering through the pain of Ned Stark’s death, the Red Wedding and “Hold the door!” one more time just seemed like too daunting a task to take on this close to the end. But since it’s been 595 days since the HBO fantasy series’ Season 7 finale aired — and that’s a whole lot of time in which to forget the history of the Seven Kingdoms — you really should catch up, like, now if you want to be prepared for your return to Westeros this evening.
Lucky for you, TheWrap made it through many “GoT”-refresher-viewing sessions and now that our re-watch is ended, we can remind you where Daenerys, Jon Snow, Cersei, Sansa, Tyrion, the Night King and 28 other key characters left off (both location-wise and plot-wise) ahead of the Season 8 premiere.
Where she is physically: Following the giant Dragonpit summit with Cersei in King’s Landing, Daenerys is currently on a boat sailing from Dragonstone to White Harbor, as she, Jon Snow and their allies head north to Winterfell. More specifically, she’s in bed on that boat having sex with Jon Snow.
Where she is mentally: Still concerned about the pressing White Walker problem after the group meet-up at the Dragonpit, anxious about meeting the Starks and being accepted by the residents of the North and very into Jon Snow. Also, she’s currently oblivious to the fact Jon Snow is the son of Lyanna Stark and her brother, Prince Rhaegar Targaryen, who were married in secret before Jon (real name Aegon Targaryen) was born. Therefore, Jon is both her nephew and the rightful heir to the Iron Throne. But she doesn’t know that and neither does he. Another big problem she is unaware of: Cersei lied about her intentions to send the Lannister forces to the North to help fight the Night King’s army.
Allegiance: Team Targaryen — but also Jon Snow.
Where he is physically: Same as Dany, but having sex with Dany — not Jon Snow.
Where he is mentally: Probably more worried than anyone about the Night King after showing everyone how to kill that wight at the Dragonpit summit, excited to return home to Winterfell, anxious about convincing the Northerners to accept the Mother of Dragons as their leader after he’s finally bent the knee and, clearly, madly in love with her. Also, he still doesn’t know his real mother and father are Lyanna Stark and Prince Rhaegar Targaryen, who were married in secret before he was born. That means he is not Ned Stark’s bastard son, but Aegon Targaryen, Dany’s nephew and the real heir to the Iron Throne. Additionally, he doesn’t know Cersei is screwing them all over with her lie to send the Lannister forces to help in the fight against the Night King.
Allegiance: Team Targaryen, but still a Stark — except that he’s also a Targaryen.
Where she is physically: King’s Landing and not moving a freakin’ inch.
Where she mentally: She’s finally, totally lost it. While she pretended she was just as worried about the Night King and his undead army as everyone else during the summit at King’s Landing and said she was totally willing to send the Lannister troops up North, that was all a lie. Cersei has no intention of helping anyone and just wants to wait for them all to be killed/kill each other. She is so serious about this that she was going to have The Mountain kill Jaime for siding with Dany and Jon and pretty much everyone else who wants to live. She’s also pregnant with Jaime’s baby and in cahoots with Euron Greyjoy, who is helping her obtain the Golden Company, a team of mercenaries, to fight on their side.
Allegiance: Team Cersei.
Where he is physically: Heading up to the North.
Where he is mentally: Really freaked out after realizing his twin/lover/mother-of-his-unborn-child, Cersei, is off her rocker. After everyone converged in King’s Landing to see a wight in person and learn about the Night King’s advancing army, Jaime knows the White Walkers are a real threat and he wants to join the others in fighting them. However, when he revealed this to Cersei, she called him a traitor and tried to have The Mountain kill him. And well, that was enough to finally get him to give up on her.
Allegiance: Team Not Cersei.
Where he is physically: Headed from Dragonstone to White Harbor on a boat with Jon and Dany, as they make their way to Winterfell. He’s also awkwardly creeping outside the door while they have sex, looking very worried about the coupling going on in there.
Where he is mentally: Trying to keep everyone alive amid the impending threat of the Night King and his undead army. Tyrion is usually the voice of reason and is prepared to talk everyone’s ear off about how great a queen Dany will be once they get up to the North. However, he does seem to be a little bit preoccupied now that he knows Dany and Jon are hooking up. And it’s been heavily hinted at for a while now that he himself is in like, if not love, with the Breaker of Chains.
Allegiance: Team Targaryen.
Where she is physically: Winterfell, waiting for Jon to come home and introduce Daenerys to the family.
Where she is mentally: A cold-blooded assassin who is readjusting to family life and actually getting along with her big sister, Sansa, for once, after killing Littlefinger for her during the Season 7 finale. Also, she’s still waiting to check a few more names off her hit list.
Allegiance: Team Stark.
Where she is physically: Winterfell, waiting for Jon to come home and introduce Daenerys to the North and (unfortunately) let her take over everything.
Where she is mentally: The Lady of Winterfell is finally rid of Littlefinger’s manipulations and closer than ever with her little sister, Arya. But she’s also probably not thrilled to be welcoming a new queen to the Starks’ ancestral home, since she’s running the place right now.
Allegiance: Team Stark, through and through.
The Night King
Where he is physically: On a zombie dragon, having just blown down The Wall with the creature’s icy/fiery breath to allow the White Walkers into the North, ready to kill
some all of the humans.
Where he is mentally: Honestly, who knows.
Allegiance: Team Undead.
Where he is physically: Winterfell, probably by a fire or under a tree.
Where he is mentally: All over the place — as the Three-Eyed Raven should be — but currently waiting to tell Jon that he’s the son of Prince Rhaegar Targaryen and Lyanna Stark, who were married in secret before Jon (real name Aegon Targaryen) was born, and thus the heir to the Iron Throne (and also Dany’s nephew).
Allegiance: Team Stark-ish. He’s got a lot going on, so hard to tell.
Where he is physically: Finally out of the poop library and back in the North with Gilly and Little Sam, hanging with Bran.
Where he is mentally: Probably feeling pretty good, as the only guy in Westeros who got to tell the Three-Eyed Raven something he didn’t already know. Bran learned in a vision back in Season 6 that Jon Snow was half-Targaryen, half-Stark, but it was Sam’s girl Gilly who read in an old man’s diary that Jon’s parents, Prince Rhaegar Targaryen and Lyanna Stark, were secretly married and Ned Stark’s bastard isn’t actually his bastard, but the rightful heir to the Iron Throne.
Allegiance: Jon Snow’s BFF.
Where he is physically: Heading back to Winterfell with Jon and Dany’s crew.
Where he is mentally: Backing Jon in everything he does, but on board with the Mother of Dragons taking the lead as long as they all live through the White Walker invasion.
Allegiance: Team Stark/Targaryen.
Where he is physically: On a boat heading to White Harbor on his way to Winterfell with the Dany and Jon’s squad.
Where he is mentally: Finally happy to be back in Daenerys’ good graces, but not thrilled about this Jon Snow guy who has gotten so close to her.
Allegiance: Team Khaleesi.
Missandei and Greyworm
Where they are physically: At Dany’s side, as always.
Where they are mentally: Off being the cutest couple in Westeros.
Allegiance: Team Dany.
Where he is physically: On that boat with the rest of Team Dany.
Where he is mentally: After years of scheming to lay the groundwork for the Targaryen return to Westeros, Varys had a relatively quiet Season 7 serving as an advisor to Dany. Although he did receive a rather ominous prediction about his death from Melisandre before he ran her out of town.
Allegiance: Team Whatever’s Best for the Realm, which for now, at least, means Team Dany.
Where she is physically: Essos, after being banished by Jon for sacrificing Stannis Baratheon’s daughter, Shireen, in a misguided attempt to get the Lord of Light to save her king’s army. That didn’t work, by the way. But before she left, she told Daenerys she thinks she’s the “Prince/Princess That Was Promised” to rule Westeros.
Where she is mentally: She told Varys that it was her destiny to die in Westeros, so our Red Priestess-in-waiting is clearly playing the long game. She’s probably already plotting whatever spooky stuff she’s gonna get up to when she makes her return in service of the Lord of the Light.
Allegiance: Team Prince That Was Promised.
Brienne of Tarth
Where she is physically: On her way back to Winterfell from King’s Landing with Podrick after attending the “What Are We Gonna Do About the Night King?” summit on Sansa’s behalf.
Where she is mentally: Doing whatever it takes to fulfill her long-ago promise to Catelyn Stark that she would keep her two daughters safe.
Allegiance: Team Sansa and Arya Stark.
Where he is physically: Presumably heading back to Winterfell with Brienne.
Where he is mentally: Riding high after reuniting with his former lord, Tyrion, and getting to escape the chatter at the Dragonpit to go drink with Bronn.
Allegiance: Team Brienne and, therefore, Team Sansa and Arya.
Where he is physically: Going to rescue Yara.
Where he is mentally: Theon has finally accepted his place as both a Stark and a Greyjoy, thanks to the encouragement of his one-time brother figure Jon Snow. Newly emboldened.
Allegiance: Team Yara.
Where he is physically: Sailing to Essos to get some boys.
Where he is mentally: Recently engaged to Cersei, Euron has been sent across the Narrow Sea to collect the Gold Company, an army of mercenaries, since just about everyone else in Westeros has come together on Team Stark-Targaryen and she needs some muscle.
Allegiance: Team Cersei.
Where she is physically: Euron’s prisoner on a boat.
Where she is mentally: Mad at her uncle for kidnapping her and mad at her brother for jumping into the ocean instead of trying to save her. The only worthwhile Greyjoy.
Allegiance: She swore allegiance to Dany a while back in exchange for a position as ruler of the Iron Islands. But for the time being, Team Get Me Off This Boat.
Where he is physically: In the North somewhere.
Where he is mentally: Tired from all that running. Gendry was last seen putting four years of rowing experience to work and single-handedly saving Jon’s crazy zombie-capture mission with a life-or-death sprint back to Eastwatch.
Allegiance: Team Bastard Bros, a.k.a. Team Jon Snow.
Where he is physically: When we last saw Tormund, he was at Eastwatch screaming “RUN!!” after seeing the Night King and his newly undead Ice Dragon Viserion rip a giant hole through The Wall. The Season 8 trailers show that he, along with Beric, survived that destruction. So we figure he’s marching south to Winterfell to let everyone know the Army of the Dead is on its way.
Where he is mentally: The threat of the Army of the Dead was why Mance Raydor worked so hard to unite all the Wildling clans. Honestly, we wouldn’t blame him if he were a little freaked out right now, even if he’ll never show it. Also he’s hot for Brienne of Tarth.
Allegiance: Team Jon Snow (so by proxy, Stark/Targaryen).
Where he is physically: With Tormund at Eastwatch (see above), and hopefully lighting up his fire sword.
Where he is mentally: Well, he just lost Thoros (more on that below), so he knows his next death will probably stick this time.
Allegiance: Team Stark/Targaryen, but more accurately, Team Living.
Sandor “The Hound” Clegane
Where he is physically: Last seen at the Dragonpit with a zombie in a box.
Where he is mentally: Still mad at his brother, The Mountain, for burning his face, even though he’s basically dead now.
Allegiance: Team Not The Mountain.
Where he is physically: The last we saw of Bronn, he and Podrick bowed out of the big meeting between the Targaryen and Lannister forces in the Dragonpit at King’s Landing. However, in what little footage we’ve seen of Season 8, Podrick appears to be back at Winterfell with Brienne. Is Bronn with him or still in King’s Landing?
Where he is mentally: Both Tyrion and Jaime — the two people he’s associated with the most — are fighting for Team Stark/Targaryen up in Winterfell. He might be looking for a new “friend,” or ready to join the fight against the Night King.
Allegiance: Bronn’s allegiance is to whoever keeps Bronn alive (and rich) the longest.
Where he is physically: As one of the few remaining (living) characters to still be in Cersei’s corner, he’s still in King’s Landing. Maybe figuring out another way to kill a dragon.
Where he is mentally: At this point, he’s going to do whatever Cersei tells him.
Allegiance: Team Cersei.
Where he is physically: Still serving as Cersei’s undead bodyguard, though he did let Jaime go without killing him.
Where he is mentally: This mindless drone didn’t even recognize his own brother, The Hound, when he saw him at the Dragonpit summit.
Allegiance: Team Cersei.
Where he is physically: After dying at the hands of the Night King — who killed him with a very carefully executed javelin toss — Viserion was pulled out of the frozen lake and brought back to life as a blue-eyed undead version of himself. He was last seen burning that huge hole through The Wall and letting the White Walkers and their Army of the Dead finally invade Westeros.
Where he is mentally: The whole point of being undead is that you don’t have a mental state.
Allegiance: This one is in the Night King’s corner.
Where they are physically: Following the rest of Team Stark/Targaryen up to Winterfell.
Where they are mentally: Probably a little pissed that the Night King killed their brother. Probably even more pissed when they see the Night King riding an undead version of him.
Allegiance: You really have to ask?
Petyr Baelish a.k.a. Littlefinger (deceased)
How he died: After scheming all through Season 7 to pit Arya and Sansa against each other, Littlefinger flew too close to the sun. The two Stark sisters schemed back at him and he was executed by Arya, finally paying for his betrayal of Ned Stark.
Olenna Tyrell (deceased)
How she died: She was poisoned by Jaime after he led the Lannister army in a takeover of Highgarden. However, in classic Olenna fashion, she got in one last jab at the Lannisters with one of the best lines of the whole series: Tell Cersei. I want her to know it was me.
Thoros of Myr (deceased)
How he died: After being gravely injured during the trek beyond The Wall to capture a wight, Thoros froze to death while the group waited for rescue. His body was burned so he doesn’t come back as a wight himself.