During Wednesday night’s monologue on “Jimmy Kimmel Live!,” Jimmy Kimmel addressed the emerging legal entanglement between Donald Trump and porn star Stormy Daniels.
At the moment, the situation revolves around a lawsuit Daniels filed Tuesday claiming that the confidentiality agreement she signed that kept her quiet about her illicit affair with the president was not valid because Trump never signed it. Kimmel went in on that aspect to begin his discussion, even going so far as to show the signature page onscreen.
“In the agreement, which was written to keep the parties involved anonymous — in the contract, Stormy was called ‘Peggy Peterson,’ so she signed above the initials ‘PP’. Trump was known — this is not a joke! This is what happened. Trump was known as ‘David Dennison.’ And you’ll see there’s no signature next to the initials DD. And by the way, even his initials have to be double Ds,” Kimmel joked. “But that’s our President. President Dennison.”
Kimmel did, of course, slip in a brief mention of the “confidential information” in the form of a “still image” — aka the “penis portrait,” as Stephen Colbert described it — that dominated the late night circuit on Wednesday, but moved on to explain how hilarious it is that Trump never reimbursed his lawyer for paying off Daniels.
“The hush money was paid about a week before the election. And this is a nice detail. According to the Wall Street Journal, Trump’s lawyer, Michael Cohen — the one who put up the $130,000 — complained to friends that Trump still hadn’t paid him back. Which, who are these people who loan Donald Trump money and think they are going to get paid back?” Kimmel said. “My rule of thumb is never lend money to anyone who had a fake university. That’s just how I roll. But, of course, he loaned the money to David Dennison, not Donald Trump.”
Kimmel ended the segment by offering offering to help Trump and Daniels sort this whole thing out — on his show, of course.
“I feel like there’s a lot of tension between Stormy Daniels and the President right now. And I hate it when couples fight so, listen guys, if you are willing I’d be happy to have you both on the show, to act as a mediator.” Kimmel said. “I don’t know about you, but I’m still rooting for those two crazy kids.”
To see these jokes and the rest of Kimmel’s monologue from Wednesday, check out the video embedded at the top of this post or on YouTube.