Thursday was Nicole Byer‘s last night guest hosting ABC’s “Jimmy Kimmel Live!” this week, and the comedian made sure to get a few more jokes in about Taylor Swift, Donald Trump and America’s current political landscape.
“Today was the first day of school in L.A., and if you’re wondering why school is starting on a random Thursday in the middle of August, the answer is simple: the state of California hates children,” Byer joked near the top of her Thursday monologue. “But school is important because it prepares kids for all the jobs that will someday be taken away from them by ChatGPT.”
Turning her attention to Swift’s announcement of her new album, “The Life of a Showgirl,” Byer rolled a clip of a Michigan news anchor who could only react this week to his co-host’s Swiftie fan theories with a bewildered, “Huh.” “That was the sound of a man’s soul leaving his body,” Byer remarked with a laugh.
The “JKL” guest host additionally joked that the names for the different versions of Swift’s new album — which include the “It’s Frightening,” “It’s Rapturous” and “It’s Beautiful” editions — are “also things that have been said to me by my gynecologist.”
Before she wrapped up her final monologue of the week, Byer also highlighted a recent study that revealed only 33% of Americans currently feel like they can trust the federal government. “The study was conducted by the Institute of Our President Is a 34-Time Convicted Felon,” she explained. “Boom! Got him again.”
“Of course we have trust issues with our leaders!” Byer continued. “Back in 2016, we dated this awful guy for four years who cheated on us with a porn star and lied about literally everything. And then we immediately jumped into a relationship with a much, much, much older man who promised to take care of us and then kind of just, like, wandered off into the woods. So now we’re back with our terrible ex and he’s crazier than ever! And we just can’t stop fantasizing about that smokeshow we shacked up with in college who gave us healthcare.”
“Yes, we can!” she exclaimed, as she then looked at a shirtless photo of former President Barack Obama. “Oh my goodness. I got distracted there for a second.”
