Stephen Colbert Can’t Use ‘Colbert Report’ Character on CBS, Lawyers Say (Video)

So “Late Show” introduces world to the ex-Comedy Central host’s “identical twin cousin”

Stephen Colbert will never appear on Stephen Colbert‘s show ever again.

We’ll let the “Late Show” host explain below — he’s referring to a bit from last week in which he and Jon Stewart brought back the popular “Colbert Report” host character.

“Immediately after that show, CBS’ top lawyer was contacted by the top lawyer from another company to say that the character Stephen Colbert is their intellectual property,” the real Colbert said. “So, it is with a heavy heart, that I announce that — thanks to corporate lawyers — the character of Stephen Colbert, host of ‘The Colbert Report,’ will never be seen again.”

Instead, on Wednesday, the late-night personality brought in “Stephen Colbert‘s identical twin cousin,” Stephen Colbert. That guy seems to love America just as much as the other dude, and can arch an eyebrow with the best of them. He also said the “Colbert Report” host was probably gay — not that there’s anything wrong with that.

Additionally, since actual human Stephen Colbert can also no longer legally perform his famous Comedy Central-era segment “The Word,” the “Late Show” host introduced the world to the “Werd.” It was equally great.

Colbert introduced the blowhard conservative character on Comedy Central’s “Colbert Report” in 2005 and retired him in 2014 when he got the “Late Show” gig from the retiring David Letterman.

Watch the video below.