(Major spoilers for “Batman v Superman” ahead. Just a heads up.)
After I first saw “Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice” back in March, I was kinda at a loss to describe exactly why I hated what I had just seen.
It was nonsense, but I couldn’t really put my finger on why. It didn’t make sense and all the character motivations were obscured, and I knew something was missing — but I could only imagine what. It felt like all that badness was on purpose, that it was the filmmakers’ intent as artists, by way, of course, of the demands of studio executives.
But “Batman v Superman” was a different kind of mess than you’d normally expect from a big-budget blockbuster with many hands on the wheel. Usually those messes are crowdpleasing ones, like “Star Wars: The Force Awakens.” “Batman v Superman” was oddly negative, cynical, angry. It gave everyone a bad vibe.
Now we have the “Batman v Superman: Ultimate Edition,” which itself seemed like the ultimate kind of cynicism: R-rated, inexplicably, and 30 minutes longer than the theatrical version. Talk about a home video cash-in! A longer cut seemed desperate, after the film didn’t become the box office mega-juggernaut Warner Bros had hoped it would.
The nerd apologists embraced the idea — which was exactly what WB was hoping: No, for real, the longer version will be better, totally. I scoffed.
But I watched it. And, lo and behold, somehow “Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice” has become something that approaches a functional movie. In the process, it only makes the original cut even more inexplicable and terrible.
What the extended cut of “Batman v Superman” adds is nothing less than all the skeletal structure it needs to make sense as a story. What’s most shocking about it is that they had all this stuff before and removed it.
In the theatrical cut, the whole thing with Lois’ trip to Africa and the subsequent framing of Superman for some murders there seemed like a weird tangent because it never went anywhere and there was never any explanation given for why anyone thought Superman had randomly murdered some civilians. In the Ultimate Edition, the trip becomes the entire lynchpin for the story, as it folds into Lexcorp’s larger ploy to destroy Superman.
It turns out Lex Luthor’s people had paid that woman to lie that Superman committed those murders, essentially to mess with him and give him some self-doubt. Lois does more journalism and unravels this greater plot — including the hugely important fact that Superman couldn’t have known that Wallace Keefe’s wheelchair was filled with explosives because it was lined with lead, and his X-ray vision can’t see through lead. It’s a ploy that we can actually make sense of with the evidence at hand, instead of by filling in the gaps.
We also have more Superman and Clark Kent in general. I knew the theatrical cut hated him — it actively tries to prevent you from understanding him as a person and thus cuts off any attempts to empathize with what he’s doing. But it turns out the theatrical version of the film hated him even more than I realized, given the scenes that were restored for the Ultimate Edition. Here we have several scenes of Clark going out and doing journalism.
We have what might be the most important scene in the entire movie for Superman as a person: After the bombing at the Senate hearing, he actually helps people in this version instead of simply flying away. He stands outside, surveying the carnage, feeling immense guilt about not being able to save them. His comment to Lois, included in the theatrical version, about how he couldn’t prevent the bombing because he wasn’t trying to, holds emotional weight rather than communicating apathy. Lois’ later discovery about the wheelchair being lined with lead means Supes was outplayed, not that he didn’t care.
Everything wrong with “Batman v Superman” isn’t fixed, though. Wonder Woman is still an underdeveloped addition to the plot. Jesse Eisenberg‘s Lex Luthor is still weird. The whole “Martha” thing is still cringeworthy. The big fight at the end is still incomprehensible. Oh, and three hours is way too long.
This extended version making sense makes the theatrical cut all the more irritating. They had the pieces to make the plot work, and they chose not to use them. They decided that the stuff that had to go to keep it at 150 minutes included most of the key story beats.
In any case, the “Batman v Superman” Ultimate Edition will be a nice thing to have going forward into the DC Extended Universe. It’s not the best possible version of the movie, but it’s better than being saddled with the theatrical cut forever.
I guess I’ll take what I can get at this point, even if it’s just a salvage job.
How does this new and improved version of “Batman v Superman” stack up against the rest of the DC Comics movies that have been released over the years? Find out in our rankings below.
Every DC Comics Movie Ranked, Including 'Zack Snyder's Justice League'
Marvel may be the dominant force in comic book movies at the moment just through sheer numbers, it's actually DC Comics that has the historical edge. Films based on DC properties go back nearly a century to those ancient Batman and Superman serials, while Marvel didn't really get things going until this century. That's a lot of history -- how does "Zack Snyder's Justice League" aka The Snyder Cut stack up?
38. "Jonah Hex" (2010)
Despite the efforts of Josh Brolin and Michael Fassbender, this is one of the worst comic book movies of the modern era.
37. "Superman IV: The Quest for Peace" (1987)
Christopher Reeve is by far the best Superman. But "Superman IV" is a bomb in every sense -- partly because of its heavy-handedness about bombs. Nuclear bombs. The film finds Superman trying to eliminate the world's nuclear threat, but his best intentions run afoul of a silly, badly dated villain named Nuclear Man.
36. "Supergirl" (1984)
We had a female-superhero movie in 1984, and it was pure cheese. But hey, at least they tried. The best thing I can say about it is there are worse things in life than this movie.
Best known as "the one Shaq was in back when he tried acting," "Steel" is pretty bad. But the fun kind of bad.
33. "Justice League" (2017)
The Joss Whedon cut of "Justice League" is a disaster on so many levels before we even talk about Superman's weird CGI mouth.
32. "Man of Steel" (2013)
Could have been worse, I guess. But it's still morally gross and has a plot that doesn't make sense. That it's very pretty to look at doesn't override those things nearly enough to make it watchable.
31. "Joker" (2019)
This is not a good characterization of the Joker as a human being, and aside from that it's just a soulless, meaningless experience.
30. "Catwoman" (2004)
Thoroughly horrible, but somehow amusing even so. Sad that it's seemingly been swept into the litter box of history.
29. "Batman & Robin" (1997)
Rightly hated, but it's tremendously entertaining here and there. Uma Thurman and Arnold Schwarzeneggar are going so far over the top I can't help but admire them.
28. "Superman III" (1983)
Featured a brilliant corporate rip-off -- one later referenced in "Office Space" -- but the attempt to funny things up with the addition of Richard Pryor didn't gel. There was also a weird bit about a weather satellite creating bad weather, which isn't what weather satellites do. Seeing Clark Kent fight Superman was pretty cool, though.
27. "Green Lantern" (2011)
Overreliance on cartoony visual effects during a period when big blockbusters were moving away from that aesthetic meant this was a movie nobody liked. Not that it was especially horrible. It just looked like a dumb cartoon and is hard to watch.
26. "The Dark Knight Rises" (2012)
Probably wasn't intended to be a grim and gritty Shumacher Batmovie, but that is indeed what it is. This is Nolan going full Hollywood, smashing plot points into place by sheer force of will rather than because they make sense. An extremely theatrical Tom Hardy as Bane is amusing front to back, and a nuke with a countdown clock on it will never get old.
25. "Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice" (2016)
A total mess that hates Superman and turns Batman into a total maniac. None of those things are good. Ben Affleck can't save the thing, but he's excellent nonetheless and gives it a huge bump it probably doesn't deserve.
24. "Watchmen" (2009)
I have no particular affection for the revered "Watchmen" comic the way a lot of other nerds do, so my distaste for this adaptation isn't personal. It just doesn't add up to nearly as much as it thinks it does.
23. "Batman" (1989)
Fondly remembered mostly because it was the first Batmovie in a couple decades. It isn't actually very good, though. The reveal that a younger version of the Joker killed Bruce Wayne's parents is as hamfistedly dumb as it gets in a "Batman" movie.
22. "V for Vendetta" (2006)
Felt nothing watching this. I tried, OK. It's impeccably made, though, and very watchable.
Giving this its own slot because it fundamentally changes the narrative of the movie and the character of Superman in the DC Extended Universe. This version is still not great (especially at three freaking hours), but it's a monumental improvement over the theatrical version.
19. "Red 2" (2013)
Did you even know these were comic book movies? Whatever, it's a great cast in a serviceable action movie and everybody's having a good time. Hard to remember, but fun.
18. "Red" (2010)
Better than its sequel, but they're basically the same.
17. "Zack Snyder's Justice League" (2021)
It's obnoxiously long and actually makes less sense than the theatrical cut. But this is still the quintessential Zack Snyder experience -- and thus it is just such a cool movie to watch. What it lacks in brains it makes up for with sheer audacity.
16. "Batman Forever" (1995)
Hits just the right tone for what Joel Shumacher was trying to do with the two films he directed. Tommy Lee Jones, as Two Face, is doing stuff in this movie that is hard to believe even today, given his perpetual sour face in nearly every other movie he's been in.
15. "Superman Returns" (2006)
Actually a pretty decent attempt by Bryan Singer to do a Christopher Reeve "Superman" movie in the present day, but Brandon Routh couldn't pull off the charisma it takes to be the Man of Steel. It was his first movie, so that's not surprising. But it's a shame, because Routh has gotten much better in the years since.
14. "Batman: Mask of the Phantasm" (1993)
Remember that time they released a "Batman" cartoon theatrically? It gets lost amongst all the live-action ones, but "Mask of the Phantasm" is better than most of them.
13. "The LEGO Batman Movie" (2017)
Funny, sweet and self-deprecating -- exactly what we needed in the wake of the disaster that was "Batman v Superman."
12. "Superman II" (1980)
Made kids everywhere cry as they watched Superman give up his powers for a normal life with Lois Lane (Margot Kidder). There are different edits of this movie, and we frankly can't keep them straight. But the sight of a powerless Clark getting beat up in a diner made Superman as sympathetic as he's ever been.
11. "Wonder Woman" (2017)
Has the standard origin movie problem of "too much story, not enough time." And the standard DC Extended Universe problem of "We gotta have a nonsensical CGI battle at the end." But despite those caveats it's an enormous delight, and a big step forward for the DCEU.
10. "Birds of Prey" (2020)
This film is sensory overload, but (mostly) in all the right ways. And it's got the best action we've ever seen in any DC or Marvel movie. This would be a top 5 DC flick easily if the storytelling wasn't such a huge mess.
9. "Wonder Woman 1984" (2020)
Patty Jenkins' has the same sort of qualities that made "Superman: The Movie" so appealing. It's earnest, sincere and serious, but not silly or gritty or full of irony.
8. "The Dark Knight" (2008)
Should be way shorter, but Heath Ledger's Joker is far and away the best villain in any of these movies. Ledger elevates what would otherwise be just another self-indulgent Christopher Nolan exercise into an endlessly watchable picture.
7. "Superman: The Movie" (1978)
This is the gold standard of Superman movies, and was the best superhero movie bar none for many, many years. John Williams' score soars, and so does the believable and compelling romance between Superman and Lois Lane. The film convincingly blended camp (in the form of Gene Hackman's wonderful Lex Luthor), an epic origin story that actually felt epic, and funny lines. The scene in which Supes and Lois fly together is one of the most beautiful metaphors for new love ever captured on film.
6. "Batman Returns" (1992)
One of the best of the franchise because it's really just a political thriller. The Penguin emerges from the sewer and runs for mayor of Gotham! It's great stuff, especially as we continue to watch the rise of Trump in our world.
5. "Shazam" (2019)
It’s just so much fun! It’s a blast to watch, and is just a really nice celebration of the good parts of humanity. “Shazam” is a movie that simply feels good to watch.
4. "Constantine" (2005)
A happy balance of serious and ridiculous, manages to find exactly the right tone for this weird religious fantasy and a cast led by Keanu Reeves. They all seem to get it.
3. "Aquaman" (2018)
It's not often that we get a comic book movie that is: full on ridiculous; loves how ridiculous it is; and is made with skill by a legitimately great filmmaker. James Wan's "Aquaman" is all of that, and it's just a wonderful experience.
2. "Batman: The Movie" (1966)
Has a timelessness that none of the other films do, and it's just a delight from beginning to end thanks to Adam West's winking Batman and the coalition of villains who can't stop cackling maniacally. Watching it again recently, I found it functions almost perfectly as a parody of the super-serious Christopher Nolan Batfilms, which is incredible.
1. "Batman Begins" (2005)
The most complete film, on its own, in the entire live-action franchise. It's just, like, a regular movie... except it's about Batman. It has actual characters and everything, and Christian Bale's Bruce Wayne even has emotions. It's weird.
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How does the revamped, four-hour-long “Justice League” fare in our rankings?
Marvel may be the dominant force in comic book movies at the moment just through sheer numbers, it's actually DC Comics that has the historical edge. Films based on DC properties go back nearly a century to those ancient Batman and Superman serials, while Marvel didn't really get things going until this century. That's a lot of history -- how does "Zack Snyder's Justice League" aka The Snyder Cut stack up?
