DC released some new poster art for “The Batman” on Wednesday, and folks, this is huge. According to the new posters, Batman not only doesn’t — we repeat DOES NOT — shave before going to work, he also likes romantic walks as the sun comes up.
OK, we might be reading way too much into it, but what isn’t up for debate is that the new poster art does, in fact, feature a very stubbly Batman looking intense, and a very pensive Batman standing on a rooftop with Catwoman as the sun comes up.
Here, see for yourself:
Ok, we’re assuming the sun is coming up, since it would probably be a little weird if the Dark Knight went walking around in his full outfit in the late afternoon. Kind of ruins the scare factor when you catch a glimpse of that batsuit while coming home from work.
I don’t know what kind of detective this version of Batman is, but let me tell you, he definitely doesn’t struggle when picking between “fights crime” and “smooth skin.” As it should be, because that is some pretty great stubble.
Anyway, you are of course very familiar with “The Batman,” but just in case you’d rather let me remember for you, it’s directed by Matt Reeves (who also helmed the recent “Planet of the Apes” reboots), and co-written by Reeves and Peter Craig.
Because apparently only two types of Batman stories are allowed to be told, “The Batman” once again zooms back to early in the Caped Crusader’s crusade, as he encounters some pretty creepy takes on some pretty classic villains. Plus probably the best possible Commissioner Gordon. It stars Robert Pattinson as Batman, Zoe Kravitz as Catwoman, Paul Dano as The Riddler and Jeffrey Wright as Commissioner Gordon.
It also features Colin Farrell as the Penguin, who we can probably assume will survive the film since he’s also the focus of an upcoming HBO Max series. (For that matter, we can also assume Gordon survives, since he’s going to show up on HBO Max in a show focused on Gotham City’s legendarily effective and non-corrupt police force.)
And, since it’s yet another Young Batman story, it also features mob boss Carmine Falcone (played by the great John Turturro), alongside Andy Serkis as Alfred Pennyworth and Peter Sarsgaard as Gotham City’s District Attorney.
“The Batman” comes out exclusively in theaters — assuming, of course, that COVID doesn’t keep, you know, COVID-ing — on March 4, 2022.